And Debate goes on...Debate goes on (La tee da dee dee)

Arrrrrr. The Cap'n is recuperating from a bout with some bad grog, so my apologies to all my loyal readers - BOTH OF YOU - for my not being around the last couple of days.

A very unusual sight indeed, a tropical storm forming off the coast of South America has not only soaked the normally-arid Aruba, Bonaire and Curacao, but as it has moved north it has become hurricane Omar. Now this late-bloomer threatens the US and British Virgin Islands, and more directly the island of Puerto Rico. Of course, people who are in the middle of Eastern Caribbean cruise itineraries that left last weekend are hatin' this. Lots of rain, wind, and the seas have got to be chunky-style anywhere near ol' Omar. But, when you book travel in Aug/Sep/Oct as we've discussed many times, it's a throw of the dice when it comes to weather. Why do you think the cruises are so cheap at that time of year? They have to fill up these massive ships one way or another, and dropping fares because of seasonality is the #1 way to do it.

Now here's what makes me laugh, Mates. I hear land-lubbers say all the time "Boy, if I were going on vacation to The Caribbean, you sure wouldn't catch me on a ship in a hurricane." My answer (in my best Hulk Hogan voice) would be Brother, that's EXACTLY where you want to be! The one place you don't want to be is stuck on an island somewhere, with no way out and praying there will be a tomorrow. Granted if you hit a rough patch, the tossing of the seas might make you a little green around the gills temporarily on a ship, but that's nothing compared with facing down a potentially life-and-death situation on land, where some evil wind named Omar has its crosshairs fixed on your aloe-vera soaked forehead. As Forrest Gump would put it, "Ships is as ships does." And what they does is keep your vacationin' family happy, healthy and far away from danger, while still providing entertainment, activities, and if you approach any of those nice little waiters and barkeeps, they'll even bring you a cold frosty one with a smile. That's vacation right there, lads and lassies.

Tonight is the final Prez debate, and everyone has two questions on their minds:

1) Will Obama be forced to come off-message to talk about happenings 20 years ago?

2) Will McCain still keep saying "My Friends" even though he's only answering Bob Schieffer?

This-here sailor doesn't see any kind of October Surprise, or game-changing moment coming, but then again this isn't your Papa's plain-old election, now is it? I'm kind of proud to see some of the changes America is making, and whether or not my candidate wins it'll be history one way or t'other. But he's gonna win, doggone it!

A while back, I kind of went off on PETA, because although there are some well-meaning pet lovers out there, the radicals have a master plan for the better-than-humans among us. According to the Agence French-Presse (that's French for newspaper) and the London Times, maybe the most active of PETA'ns have moved to Switzerland. I never quite understood how the most neutral country on Earth has it's biggest claim to fame as exporting Army knives, but that's just me. Anyway, in this story it's reported that effective September 2008, Switzerland imposed the world's most extensive array of animal "rights"ever. If it's at the expense of humans or not, that's for you to decide...

Dog owners must take, at their own expense, classes in pet care. Likewise, Fishermen must take a class in the humane treatment of fish. I guess that would be "don't chop their little heads off", but that's how they earn their livelihood! Animals listed on their hand-selected registry as "social animals" (including goldfish, hamsters, sheep, goats, and yaks. Yes, my friends I said yaks) must be kept with or near another of their species. You want to have yourself one little pet something-or-other in Switzerland these days? NO SHEEP FOR YOU! Thank you, Seinfeld. Oh wait, it gets even stranger. We've all heard of living in a goldfish bowl. Not any more. Goldfish, by law, must be furnished at least some "privacy". In other words, no completely transparent tanks, and they can only be killed humanely, never flushed down the latrine alive.

Enforcement of these new laws, as you might imagine, will be nonsensical and as complicated and insanely-thought-out as the master plan itself. I'd call the whole thing bird-brained, but somebody might come and implant a metal chip in my skull, to re-program me in a more pet-friendly manner. That can't be good for passing through airport security....