Debate-And-Switch

Just when you think our Fine American Democracy has been beaten and battered to the ground, somebody digs a hole and plants it even further down. I feel whether you're in the USA, Canada, Guatemala, Uzbekistan, or wherever there are people: if someone is sick they should have a basic human right of treatment. It's not socialism, it's called HUMANITY, derived from the words "human" and "sanity" if I'm not mistaken. But ever since politics became a nationally-televised event over the last couple of decades, with countless left and right-sided proponents filling the airwaves 24/7, reason has unfortunately fallen by the wayside. I would submit we're closer to treason than reason in some of these debates. Town hall meetings? Not really. They're photo-ops. They're diving platforms for the loud and louder to perform a cannonball from 50 feet, splashing the unwitting American public with their backwash. Nowadays, people can bring guns openly to political events, even when government representatives (including The President) are there. These people say they are proclaiming their 2nd Amendment rights. I call it BRANDISHING their 2nd Amendment rights, but at some point it becomes obscenity. What a load. You can't yell fire in a crowded theater. We're about an inch away from somebody putting a gun to someone's head in a public forum, and claiming 2nd amendment rights to do so. Those aren't rights - those are WRONGS when they're used in an overtly menacing way. When we fazed out the 60's, I was hoping I had seen the last of the truly radical movements, but they're still out there. A bit more disguised as the common man, but equipped with the same tunnel-vision mentality. Radical left. Radical right. Radical extremist. Radical (insert any religion here). If you look closely, there's one common bond in every description, and it's sad we can't just get along as a human race.

So why am I on my soapbox today? Because of another incident at a town hall-like meeting last night in California. Lucky for the "stars" of this episode that guns weren't involved, but one person still bit off more than he could chew. According to CNN, 65-year old William Rice was across the street from a health reform rally last night in Thousand Oaks, CA. Some time during the festivities, words were exchanged and Mr. Rice claims an unidentified man came running towards him yelling, "You're an idiot. You're an idiot." Ok, let's stop the movie! What Mr. Rice did NOT tell CNN was what he was doing or saying that resulted in the unnamed man coming after him. However, a spokesperson for the Ventura County Sherriff's Office says Rice was a counter-demonstrator, who was at the rally not by accident, but by choice. Paid or not, that has yet to be determined. Back to the movie! So as Mr. Unnamed approaches our "innocent bystander," Mr. Rice did the only proudly-American thing he could think of: he threw the first punch, catching the man flush on the nose with an overhand right (by the way, it's up to you, the reader to determine if the words "overhand right" have any further symbolism). Mr. Rice's justification was equally all-American: "If I hadn't hit him first, he'd have hit me." See President Bush? You DID have a lasting impact on our society after all! Anyway, a brouhaha ensued between the two men after the initial punch was thrown, and at some point a part of Mr. Rice's left hand wound up in the other man's mouth. Go figure. Mr. Unnamed apparently did the only all-American thing HE could think of as well, biting off the end of one of Mr. Rice's fingers. A short while after the fisticuffs had ended, Mr. Rice showed up at the Los Robles Hospital in Thousand Oaks, with the detached finger-portion in a cup of ice. He and the doctors discussed re-attaching the digit, but after a few minutes Mr. Rice told them to "keep it" and left the ER of his own accord. The hospital disposed of the stinky pinky and that was that. Now I don't know about you, but if I'm at an EMERGENCY ROOM, with TRAINED DOCTORS, and they have my DECAPITATED PINKY on ice, and can SEW IT BACK ON (albeit for a fee), my answer is
"Yes Sir & Madam & Thank You!" This brings up a really interesting topic. Mr. Rice was there to demonstrate against health care reform, right? So did he not have his finger sewn back on because....eh....maybe he doesn't have health insurance? Or it was too expensive? Maybe he was just afraid of being known as "digitally enhanced."

Note to Mr. Rice: It's not too late to change teams. There is no "trade deadline" and nobody will hold a grudge if you switch to the other side. In case you're not sure who that is exactly, we go under a single name. We don't have a city or nation in the title, like New York Jets or Manchester United or Team Korea. Nope, it's much simpler. We call ourselves Humanity.

Now that you've read my slam-for-the-day, you might think it's only Americans that have lost their minds. Au contraire, Mon Amie! Le French are just as, how-you-say, Fou and Folle cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. There are two neighboring suburbs of Paris, whose feuding mayors have each taken a bull-headed stance against the other. They have caused traffic chaos, by each declaring the same street as a one-way thoroughfare. How can that be a problem? The mayor of Levallois-Perret decided the street brought too much traffic through his town, so he made it a one-way road, sending cars EASTBOUND into neighboring Clichy-la-Garenne, whose mayor responded by declaring his section of the street one-way WESTBOUND back towards Levallois-Perret. The result has drivers unable to go left, right, or straight as they try to get around both towns. VIVE LA DIFFERENCE! At least nobody had their fingers bitten off. Yet.

Hey bargain shoppers! If you're thinking Europe is over and done with for 2009, you might be missing out on some last-minute savings. Especially if you have enough frequent flier miles to get there. The "shoulder" and "offseason" cruises in September and October are not completely full. In fact, some lines are offering Senior Discounts or Resident Rates (from specific states where they're trying to increase their business share). Some of these rates are hundreds of dollars per person below the standard pricing, as they're trying to fill up the remaining cabins on board. Just this week, I had someone whose Cabo San Lucas honeymoon was interrupted by Hurricane Jimena, and we were able to re-book them on a Greek Islands cruise with Royal Caribbean. Even though they didn't have any mileage to cash in, the cruise line was able to still get air for them, and off they go. That could be YOU! If you're getting the itch to travel, scratch it by calling The Cap'n. Go on now. Pick up the phone....I'm waiting....