"Riddle me this, Batman....With the Atlantic Ocean standing in your way, how would you move Holland to Bermuda?"
The answer: propellers
After an extended absence, Holland America announced last September they will make a return to the lovely island of Bermuda in 2010. So why I am I reporting this "news" today? Because the response has been so overwhelming among their past passengers, they have just added 4 more months of service! The original plan was to have the Veendam sail from New York for a handful of cruises, starting in August of 2010. The ship will stop in both Hamilton and St. George's, scheduled for approximately 2 1/2 days in each, which is fantastic. Demand was so great, they have decided to open up a full season of Bermuda sailings, starting as early as April 2010. That means a full season of 24 departures. Why is this so important to report? Think about it. Right now, they have a ship that is scheduled to be 100% empty for April, May, June and July! You can get the maximum early-booking discounted rates right now, and even more importantly you can pick and choose the finest cabin locations, in whatever category you wish. Anyone who has ever sailed across the Atlantic knows Bermuda sailings can be a bit challenging with more waves and swells than a typical Caribbean cruise. So it's important to get that perfect cabin spot, where you know you'll have the smoothest ride possible, and the optimum vacation experience. In the entire Western Hemisphere, Bermuda is my favorite island, so I'd urge anyone interested to call us right away at (800) 835-9828, for assistance and discount pricing. This space is going to sell out quickly, so give yourself a Christmas present today!
Oh yeah. You're probably wondering about my sinus infection (sure you are!). I'm obviously not dead just yet, so that's progress. I had a nice doctor do a "procedure" yesterday, which I considered more of an "excavation" inside about half my face. Lo and behold, I'm pretty as a picture today and I have the nice doctor and a container of happy pills to thank. So quit worrying yourself about The Cap'n. It takes more than a backhoe inside my head to cause any real damage.
Doesn't money talk make you dizzy? It sure does me. This morning, a bailout of the auto industry was announced, with CNN reporting 13.4 billion, and USAToday saying 17 billion. Does anybody see a slight difference there? Like a tiny little 3.6 billion? Think about a billion. It's a THOUSAND MILLION. Seems like every night on the news we're hearing numbers that sound like an imaginative child playing Monopoly. "I'll pay a Gazillion dollars to put hotels on Boardwalk and Park Place, and as soon as you land on them, you'll owe me about a Kadillion Triplebazillion dollars!" It's come to the point where I don't think even the news services and anchormen can wrap their heads around it, really. I'm still working on my multiplication tables and trying to figure out how the smart kids are able to use a stinkin' slide rule. I use mine whenever something falls behind the dresser that I can't quite reach...
Some men like Ralph Lauren Silver. Others have a preference for Davidoff Cool Water. Whatever scent you think attracts someone to you, there is definitely a new player in the men's fragrance market. He claims to be The King. The Associated Press reports there is a new scent available on the market, a men's body spray called "Flame." What's so special about that? The product comes from Burger King, which it describes as:
"the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat." The fast food chain is marketing the product through an inter-active website, featuring romantic backdrops. If by chance you're pro-active enough to play around for a while, you may figure out how to see The King, in an awkwardly amorous setting by a fireplace. I realize it's a bit hard to fathom, but you can check it out at: http://www.firemeetsdesire.com/.
What ever happened to the days of "ours tastes better?" Amazing. Then again, it gets people talking so the old saying all advertising is good advertising must still apply.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
If I seem a little absent....
I haven't been bloggin' while there's a little problem with my noggin'. Yes, even immortal Seafarers like myself can sometimes get sinus infections, and while I'm dealing with it, the sense of humor has taken a back seat. Fear not, I'll be fine. As they say, "The only thing to fear is The Joker himself, or possibly Simon Cowell." Heck, I've lived through Iraq, Afghanistan, Iraq again, Viet Nam, another Iraq or some neighboring area that reminds me of Iraq, and at least 3 World Wars, so I'll make it through this. Anyway, keep checking back and as soon as I get back on the good foot, you'll be the first to know. Ok maybe you'll be 3rd or 4th, but you made the top half-dozen, so hold your heads high even if I can't.....
The Cap'n
The Cap'n
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Snow White? All-Right!
Before you get to thinking I'm talking about some overcrowded, overpriced, over-the-top theme park full of screamin' kids, remember I'm a scraggly old ship's Cap'n with about as much patience as you can fit on a dime. Snow white only means one thing to me: pristine beaches that look like sugar, and plenty of salt water! So where am I talking about today? Mexico? Nope, that was yesterday although they DO have some nice sand. Antigua? Another pretty beach area, but no cigar.
How about a little closer to home? Like that big 'ol banana hanging off the East Coast of the USA, known as Florida. Most everyone thinks of Florida in this order:
1) Orlando (see above, about them kids and all)
2) Miami/South Beach (action, but not Florida's best beaches)
3) Key West (another great area, but not today's subject)
If you do the math, you'll see that's only 3 cities, which wouldn't even fill up a corner of Rhode Island....there's plenty of Florida left to talk about! Because people going South from North typically enter Florida on I-75 cutting through mid-state, or I-95 that runs all the way down the Eastern side of Florida's most populous coast, it's only the adventurous that cross Interstate 4 or Alligator Alley to see what the West Coast has to offer. When it comes to beaches in the Sunshine State, West Coast means BEST Coast for beaches. For some reason, the Eastern (Atlantic) side of the state has nice kind-of-white-kind-of-brownish sand, but the Gulf of Mexico side, which feeds from the Caribbean Sea, has significantly brighter, whiter sand and prettier water. You may not find as many luxury or world-class resorts on that side of the state simply because it IS less-populous, an insider's secret because of the geography of getting there. Like I said, everybody stays on I-75, I-95 and the Florida Turnpike, which won't get you to the Promised Land! I say don't bother getting in your car at all. You don't really want all that salt and sand messing up your car, so here's my idea for you...
We can fly you down, and arrange for a rental car to be waiting for you. We'll book you into whatever level of hotel or resort you want, and it'll all be prepaid. You'll just have the common-sense things left like meals and gasoline, but otherwise we'll do the thinkin' and you can do the drinkin'. Sound like a plan? Here are some names you may have heard, but don't really know much about: Naples & Ft. Myers. Sarasota & Longboat Key. Tampa & St. Petersburg. Pensacola & Destin. There are resort areas like Marco Island. Your choices are boundless, and if all you've ever done in the past is Central and Eastern Florida, you've missed a lot. Particularly when it comes to relaxation and gorgeous beach and water. Oh yeah. Your vacation is a whole lot simpler, too. No passports. No Customs and Immigration. Half the crowds of the East Coast beaches. Less traffic. Lower prices than in the more well-known areas. Have I got your attention yet? It's true that families with small kids may find a bit less to do on the Western side than in Orlando or Miami, but right from the start of the blog today, you can pretty much tell that's not who I'm addressing. Let us put together a stress-free package to the Best Coast for you, and I'd be willing to bet you'll go back for seconds. When I personally vacation in Florida, I never consider anything other than which Western beach I'm doing next.
A Pennsylvania chemical engineer is working on a line of fragrances aimed at those who are nostalgic for their university years. Katie Masik's Harrisburg-based company, Masik Collegiate Fragrances,has already created scents for the University of North Carolina and Penn State, and she's working on the University of Georgia, LSU and other schools. Look for them to be on the market next year, according to a Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel report Thursday. Masik said she visits the schools and speaks with students and alumni, before settling on the scent that best defines the school.“I get a lot of requests for beer smell and sweaty football players,” Masik said. From my own college days (daze), my thoughts drift back to smells like 2-day-old pizza that has a couple bites out of it, some Jovan Musk Oil, and that skinny guy with the black glasses that ran the audio-visual equipment during class, when the air conditioning was out. Pheww! Maybe Ms. Masik should work on a scent that plays the Allman Brothers' "In Memory Of Elizabeth Reed" when you unscrew the top. I'd buy me some of that!
My thanks to Bizarre News for a few little gems. These are some funny snippets from actual ads, taken from various newspapers, just in time for the Holidays:
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
The New And Improved SUPERSTORE! Unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.
The Cap'n
How about a little closer to home? Like that big 'ol banana hanging off the East Coast of the USA, known as Florida. Most everyone thinks of Florida in this order:
1) Orlando (see above, about them kids and all)
2) Miami/South Beach (action, but not Florida's best beaches)
3) Key West (another great area, but not today's subject)
If you do the math, you'll see that's only 3 cities, which wouldn't even fill up a corner of Rhode Island....there's plenty of Florida left to talk about! Because people going South from North typically enter Florida on I-75 cutting through mid-state, or I-95 that runs all the way down the Eastern side of Florida's most populous coast, it's only the adventurous that cross Interstate 4 or Alligator Alley to see what the West Coast has to offer. When it comes to beaches in the Sunshine State, West Coast means BEST Coast for beaches. For some reason, the Eastern (Atlantic) side of the state has nice kind-of-white-kind-of-brownish sand, but the Gulf of Mexico side, which feeds from the Caribbean Sea, has significantly brighter, whiter sand and prettier water. You may not find as many luxury or world-class resorts on that side of the state simply because it IS less-populous, an insider's secret because of the geography of getting there. Like I said, everybody stays on I-75, I-95 and the Florida Turnpike, which won't get you to the Promised Land! I say don't bother getting in your car at all. You don't really want all that salt and sand messing up your car, so here's my idea for you...
We can fly you down, and arrange for a rental car to be waiting for you. We'll book you into whatever level of hotel or resort you want, and it'll all be prepaid. You'll just have the common-sense things left like meals and gasoline, but otherwise we'll do the thinkin' and you can do the drinkin'. Sound like a plan? Here are some names you may have heard, but don't really know much about: Naples & Ft. Myers. Sarasota & Longboat Key. Tampa & St. Petersburg. Pensacola & Destin. There are resort areas like Marco Island. Your choices are boundless, and if all you've ever done in the past is Central and Eastern Florida, you've missed a lot. Particularly when it comes to relaxation and gorgeous beach and water. Oh yeah. Your vacation is a whole lot simpler, too. No passports. No Customs and Immigration. Half the crowds of the East Coast beaches. Less traffic. Lower prices than in the more well-known areas. Have I got your attention yet? It's true that families with small kids may find a bit less to do on the Western side than in Orlando or Miami, but right from the start of the blog today, you can pretty much tell that's not who I'm addressing. Let us put together a stress-free package to the Best Coast for you, and I'd be willing to bet you'll go back for seconds. When I personally vacation in Florida, I never consider anything other than which Western beach I'm doing next.
A Pennsylvania chemical engineer is working on a line of fragrances aimed at those who are nostalgic for their university years. Katie Masik's Harrisburg-based company, Masik Collegiate Fragrances,has already created scents for the University of North Carolina and Penn State, and she's working on the University of Georgia, LSU and other schools. Look for them to be on the market next year, according to a Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel report Thursday. Masik said she visits the schools and speaks with students and alumni, before settling on the scent that best defines the school.“I get a lot of requests for beer smell and sweaty football players,” Masik said. From my own college days (daze), my thoughts drift back to smells like 2-day-old pizza that has a couple bites out of it, some Jovan Musk Oil, and that skinny guy with the black glasses that ran the audio-visual equipment during class, when the air conditioning was out. Pheww! Maybe Ms. Masik should work on a scent that plays the Allman Brothers' "In Memory Of Elizabeth Reed" when you unscrew the top. I'd buy me some of that!
My thanks to Bizarre News for a few little gems. These are some funny snippets from actual ads, taken from various newspapers, just in time for the Holidays:
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
The New And Improved SUPERSTORE! Unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.
Christmas sale - handmade gifts, for that hard-to-find person.
Get rid of unwanted aunts. Zap Traps will do the job in 24 hours or less!
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross included.
And a Happy Holiday to you as well!The Cap'n
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Mexi-Go!
Over the last few months, I've heard from a number of my cruise clients, raising the same point when they get back from vacation. Invariably they had a great time, but they felt like they were being "nickeled-and-dimed" more than ever before. REALITY CHECK: With the Caribbean chock-full of ships holding 3,000+ passengers, in the midst of the worst economy since the 1930's, cruise lines are having to offer low entry-level pricing to attract business. They are still having to serve up lobster, steak and everything else cruise passengers expect, so there is a lot of pressure to generate onboard revenue (that's a nice code name for nickel-and-diming, but after all it IS a business). Today, we're seeing cruise prices as low as they've been in 20 years. When I got in the cruise business about 33 years ago, it was common for a 7-night cruise to be $1200-1500 per person. Most cruise lines were privately-owned companies. I remember when I got into the selling side in 1989, the port charges and taxes on a cruise were around $39. Today, it's not surprising to see taxes totalling $300 or more!
You're probably asking "Is that kind of increase even possible?" Not really, if the truth be told, but it's a secret way cruise lines adjust pricing, so that even we as travel agents are feeling the pinch of getting nickeled-and-dimed. As I mentioned the lines used to be privately owned, but now they're almost all publicly-owned, traded on major stock markets. I don't think it's a coincidence that as shareholders ask for more return on their investment, the cruise lines have become extremely creative with how they price cruises. Everything's legal, just "different." Let me explain how this works, and dispel some rumors and myths at the same time.
Some people don't use travel agents. Say WHAT!? They believe that somehow they pay more to go through a travel agent when booking a cruise, than to just call the cruise line themselves. That is TOTALLY UNTRUE! You don't pay us any extra fees on cruise bookings, and actually we often have group space or other volume discounts, that will save you money over booking direct, not cost you more. So how do we get paid? The way it works is cruise lines pays us a small commission behind-the-scenes, on the cruise fare. It's not economically feasible for them to have 10's of thousands of reservation agents on their payroll, especially in a down economy. So they welcome the assistance of travel agents, and as a reward for helping complete payment transactions and fill their ships, they pay us a little "thank you," once people have sailed. Notice I mentioned cruise fare. Back in the day, you might have seen a cruise fare of $1100, and port charges of $39. They realized they were paying travel agents commission on $1100, but since they pay nothing on taxes, it created a sweeping industry turnaround. Over the next few years, cruise fares have been shrinking to ridiculously-low levels, while taxes and fees have increased exponentially. We recently read reports of a 3-night NCL cruise where the agent commission was $3. That's not a misprint. Three bucks. The supposed taxes were over $200, but the part they consider commissionable was almost non-existent. You can't even create an invoice, mail it to someone and break even for $3. So trust me when I tell you, agencies are feeling your pain! You can see why passengers are getting sticker-shock, when confronted with their onboard charges, shore excursion prices, service fees, etc. during the trip.
Having said all that, cruising is still an excellent value in many parts of the world. I tell people cruising is like a box of chocolates, which means you can sample different ports or islands, to see what they're like. Maybe after you find a destination or two that you fall in love with, you can plan a vacation back there on a later trip. If you just like cruising, I understand. Me too! But it's also important in the current economy, to have a good idea what your vacation is going to cost, before you ever leave home. It's called budgeting. For that reason, even though I'm an old Sea-Dog, I send more clients to island or country destinations these days, to a relatively-new type of resort called an All-Inclusive. What the heck is an all-inclusive, anyway? Gee, it kind of sounds like a place where everything is included....
WE HAVE A WINNER, Ladies and Gentlemen!
One of the reasons cruises became so popular 25-30 years ago, besides a little TV show called Love Boat, is that many upscale resorts started doing the unthinkable to their best customers. See if this sounds familiar: they started nickel-and-diming them with exorbitant resort fees, sky-high food and drink prices, and so on. Hmmmmm. Could this be an example of life imitating art imitating life imitating, oh you know what I mean. Many resorts have now decided they can put together a complete package, including fabulous accommodations, unlimited meals, drinks, gratuities, activities (within reason), and really win back those people who abandoned them due to their greed years ago. The best way to say you're sorry is to make it back up to the person. Isn't that the way life is supposed to work?
Not all destinations offer all-inclusive packages. Case in point, the USA! We have almost none, because resorts don't get liquor duty-free, our food costs can be higher, and by the time they'd package something comparable to a Caribbean destination, the price would be through the roof. There are islands in the Caribbean that offer all-inclusive options, but not all of them. But it's not all about the islands. There is a country bordered on the East by the Caribbean Sea, on on the West by the Pacific Ocean, that has more all-inclusive options than just about anywhere you can imagine: MEXICO!
Mexico has become the king of all-inclusive destinations on both coasts. From the red-rock beauty of Cabo San Lucas, to the sleepy mountain scenery of Puerto Vallarta, to the white-sand beaches of Cancun and the Mayan Riviera, there are beach destinations all over Mexico that offer fantastic value. The upscale resorts all have water purification plants, excellent food, and before you leave your house you will know almost exactly what you'll be spending. Alcoholic beverages are included, as are soft drinks, and even the gratuities are pre-paid in your trip cost. Some Mexican cities offer choices ranging from economy to world-class resorts, and many activities are included such as non-motorized water sports, tennis, basketball, putt-putt, and much more. Certain hotels offer free golf. Others have free tours built in, such as seeing one of the 7-wonders of the world, the great pyramid at Chichen Itza. Or horseback riding. Or a sunset cruise. On and on, the variety and VALUE are unmatched by just about anywhere else in the Western Hemisphere. I didn't even mention places like Acapulco, Ixtapa, Cozumel and others. Whether you're a diver, golfer, beach bum, or just want pampering and relaxation, Mexico has it all.
Now - depending on you, the traveler, there can still be other expenses involved. If you go to a spa facility and plan to have treatments, just like any other spa those are "a la carte." For golfers, the greens fees may be included, but they may have a charge for a cart or club rental. How can you find out these things? Call us! This is what we do. Sure you can research the internet, but we can do better. We can give you active feedback from hundreds or thousands of clients that we've personally sold to the top Mexican resorts. We'll ask you questions, to find out what exactly you're looking for out of the trip, and will make recommendations based on the budget you give us. IMPORTANT NOTE: When calling us for an all-inclusive, give the agent your full, real budget. If your budget is $4000, don't tell us $2500 (keeping the extra $1500 in reserve at the back of your mind). It's an all-inclusive! You don't need to keep a huge reserve like you might on a cruise, and the difference between an artificially-low budget and what you really can spend could throw our recommendations way off. Instead of offering you a world-class experience, we may be offering you something still very good, but not in the same league. That's because we're basing our recommendations on the type of hotel and budget you give us. I can't stress to you enough how important it is to be up-front with your booking agent on how much you truly have in the budget for your trip! The difference to your vacation satisfaction can be enormous. Let's get you down to Mexico. Call us today!
Here's a big OOPS! When George W. Bush was elected 8 years ago, a web developing company copyrighted the domain name http://www.georgewbushlibrary.com/. They maintained it year after year for a $10 re-registration fee, and were planning to do so forever, as the official website of W's library. Well, somebody was asleep at the switch, and they accidentally let it expire. When they went back in to re-register, a Raleigh North Carolina based Karate school had bought it. Illuminiti Karate purchased the name for $10, and when web developer Yuma Solutions asked for it back, they said SURE. No problem. It's absolutely for sale. Our price? $35,000. Mark Mills, owner of Yuma Solutions, did not immediately return calls seeking comment Thursday. The Tallahassee, Florida-based company has a history with the Bush family, hosting Web sites for Bush's 2000 campaign and for Florida Gov. Jeb Bush's 1998 and 2002 campaigns. Unfortunately for Yuma, they were left in the awkward position of having to buy the domain name back, and paying the $35,000. Whatcha going to do? Argue with a red-belt karate Grand Master?
For you Christmas fans who prefer a "live" Nativity scene, as opposed to plastic animals and plastic baby Jesus, the price of poker is going up this year. One example is in Wisconsin, where the cost of renting live camels has gone through the manger roof! People who had rented camels in the past are replacing them with much cheaper options, such as donkeys and sheep. It may cost $2,100 to rent three camels on ChristmasEve , where you can get a half dozen of the other little farm critters for a mere $250, according to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel. Kathy Meyer, whose family owns Jo-Don Farms in Franksville, Wisconsin told the newspaper, “We're expecting this year to be worse than normal. Some groups have replaced camels, and it has hurt us because we've kept and fed them all year, and now there is no demand.” Is it just me? With as much beautiful, fertile farmland as there is in Wisconsin, did raising camels for a 1-night yearly rental, strike anyone as a good idea? OK, maybe Micheal Jackson, but anyone else? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?
You're probably asking "Is that kind of increase even possible?" Not really, if the truth be told, but it's a secret way cruise lines adjust pricing, so that even we as travel agents are feeling the pinch of getting nickeled-and-dimed. As I mentioned the lines used to be privately owned, but now they're almost all publicly-owned, traded on major stock markets. I don't think it's a coincidence that as shareholders ask for more return on their investment, the cruise lines have become extremely creative with how they price cruises. Everything's legal, just "different." Let me explain how this works, and dispel some rumors and myths at the same time.
Some people don't use travel agents. Say WHAT!? They believe that somehow they pay more to go through a travel agent when booking a cruise, than to just call the cruise line themselves. That is TOTALLY UNTRUE! You don't pay us any extra fees on cruise bookings, and actually we often have group space or other volume discounts, that will save you money over booking direct, not cost you more. So how do we get paid? The way it works is cruise lines pays us a small commission behind-the-scenes, on the cruise fare. It's not economically feasible for them to have 10's of thousands of reservation agents on their payroll, especially in a down economy. So they welcome the assistance of travel agents, and as a reward for helping complete payment transactions and fill their ships, they pay us a little "thank you," once people have sailed. Notice I mentioned cruise fare. Back in the day, you might have seen a cruise fare of $1100, and port charges of $39. They realized they were paying travel agents commission on $1100, but since they pay nothing on taxes, it created a sweeping industry turnaround. Over the next few years, cruise fares have been shrinking to ridiculously-low levels, while taxes and fees have increased exponentially. We recently read reports of a 3-night NCL cruise where the agent commission was $3. That's not a misprint. Three bucks. The supposed taxes were over $200, but the part they consider commissionable was almost non-existent. You can't even create an invoice, mail it to someone and break even for $3. So trust me when I tell you, agencies are feeling your pain! You can see why passengers are getting sticker-shock, when confronted with their onboard charges, shore excursion prices, service fees, etc. during the trip.
Having said all that, cruising is still an excellent value in many parts of the world. I tell people cruising is like a box of chocolates, which means you can sample different ports or islands, to see what they're like. Maybe after you find a destination or two that you fall in love with, you can plan a vacation back there on a later trip. If you just like cruising, I understand. Me too! But it's also important in the current economy, to have a good idea what your vacation is going to cost, before you ever leave home. It's called budgeting. For that reason, even though I'm an old Sea-Dog, I send more clients to island or country destinations these days, to a relatively-new type of resort called an All-Inclusive. What the heck is an all-inclusive, anyway? Gee, it kind of sounds like a place where everything is included....
WE HAVE A WINNER, Ladies and Gentlemen!
One of the reasons cruises became so popular 25-30 years ago, besides a little TV show called Love Boat, is that many upscale resorts started doing the unthinkable to their best customers. See if this sounds familiar: they started nickel-and-diming them with exorbitant resort fees, sky-high food and drink prices, and so on. Hmmmmm. Could this be an example of life imitating art imitating life imitating, oh you know what I mean. Many resorts have now decided they can put together a complete package, including fabulous accommodations, unlimited meals, drinks, gratuities, activities (within reason), and really win back those people who abandoned them due to their greed years ago. The best way to say you're sorry is to make it back up to the person. Isn't that the way life is supposed to work?
Not all destinations offer all-inclusive packages. Case in point, the USA! We have almost none, because resorts don't get liquor duty-free, our food costs can be higher, and by the time they'd package something comparable to a Caribbean destination, the price would be through the roof. There are islands in the Caribbean that offer all-inclusive options, but not all of them. But it's not all about the islands. There is a country bordered on the East by the Caribbean Sea, on on the West by the Pacific Ocean, that has more all-inclusive options than just about anywhere you can imagine: MEXICO!
Mexico has become the king of all-inclusive destinations on both coasts. From the red-rock beauty of Cabo San Lucas, to the sleepy mountain scenery of Puerto Vallarta, to the white-sand beaches of Cancun and the Mayan Riviera, there are beach destinations all over Mexico that offer fantastic value. The upscale resorts all have water purification plants, excellent food, and before you leave your house you will know almost exactly what you'll be spending. Alcoholic beverages are included, as are soft drinks, and even the gratuities are pre-paid in your trip cost. Some Mexican cities offer choices ranging from economy to world-class resorts, and many activities are included such as non-motorized water sports, tennis, basketball, putt-putt, and much more. Certain hotels offer free golf. Others have free tours built in, such as seeing one of the 7-wonders of the world, the great pyramid at Chichen Itza. Or horseback riding. Or a sunset cruise. On and on, the variety and VALUE are unmatched by just about anywhere else in the Western Hemisphere. I didn't even mention places like Acapulco, Ixtapa, Cozumel and others. Whether you're a diver, golfer, beach bum, or just want pampering and relaxation, Mexico has it all.
Now - depending on you, the traveler, there can still be other expenses involved. If you go to a spa facility and plan to have treatments, just like any other spa those are "a la carte." For golfers, the greens fees may be included, but they may have a charge for a cart or club rental. How can you find out these things? Call us! This is what we do. Sure you can research the internet, but we can do better. We can give you active feedback from hundreds or thousands of clients that we've personally sold to the top Mexican resorts. We'll ask you questions, to find out what exactly you're looking for out of the trip, and will make recommendations based on the budget you give us. IMPORTANT NOTE: When calling us for an all-inclusive, give the agent your full, real budget. If your budget is $4000, don't tell us $2500 (keeping the extra $1500 in reserve at the back of your mind). It's an all-inclusive! You don't need to keep a huge reserve like you might on a cruise, and the difference between an artificially-low budget and what you really can spend could throw our recommendations way off. Instead of offering you a world-class experience, we may be offering you something still very good, but not in the same league. That's because we're basing our recommendations on the type of hotel and budget you give us. I can't stress to you enough how important it is to be up-front with your booking agent on how much you truly have in the budget for your trip! The difference to your vacation satisfaction can be enormous. Let's get you down to Mexico. Call us today!
Here's a big OOPS! When George W. Bush was elected 8 years ago, a web developing company copyrighted the domain name http://www.georgewbushlibrary.com/. They maintained it year after year for a $10 re-registration fee, and were planning to do so forever, as the official website of W's library. Well, somebody was asleep at the switch, and they accidentally let it expire. When they went back in to re-register, a Raleigh North Carolina based Karate school had bought it. Illuminiti Karate purchased the name for $10, and when web developer Yuma Solutions asked for it back, they said SURE. No problem. It's absolutely for sale. Our price? $35,000. Mark Mills, owner of Yuma Solutions, did not immediately return calls seeking comment Thursday. The Tallahassee, Florida-based company has a history with the Bush family, hosting Web sites for Bush's 2000 campaign and for Florida Gov. Jeb Bush's 1998 and 2002 campaigns. Unfortunately for Yuma, they were left in the awkward position of having to buy the domain name back, and paying the $35,000. Whatcha going to do? Argue with a red-belt karate Grand Master?
For you Christmas fans who prefer a "live" Nativity scene, as opposed to plastic animals and plastic baby Jesus, the price of poker is going up this year. One example is in Wisconsin, where the cost of renting live camels has gone through the manger roof! People who had rented camels in the past are replacing them with much cheaper options, such as donkeys and sheep. It may cost $2,100 to rent three camels on ChristmasEve , where you can get a half dozen of the other little farm critters for a mere $250, according to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel. Kathy Meyer, whose family owns Jo-Don Farms in Franksville, Wisconsin told the newspaper, “We're expecting this year to be worse than normal. Some groups have replaced camels, and it has hurt us because we've kept and fed them all year, and now there is no demand.” Is it just me? With as much beautiful, fertile farmland as there is in Wisconsin, did raising camels for a 1-night yearly rental, strike anyone as a good idea? OK, maybe Micheal Jackson, but anyone else? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Terminal Happiness
The Port of Seattle is opening Terminal 91 next April, as the Alaska cruise business expands further with more USA departures. Apparently Carnival Corporation is giddy at the prospects - so much so, they've already signed a 10-year agreement. Carnival is the biggest player in Seattle, with their Holland America and Princess brands having at least 5 ships based there during the Summer, carrying over 420,000 passengers from Seattle each year. Terminal 91 will be located just north of downtown Seattle, featuring panoramic views of the city's skyline, Mt. Rainier and the Olympic Mountains. The two-story, 143,000-sq. ft. facility has two berths that are 4-football fields long, both equipped to provide shore power for ships so they can shut down their engines in port.
I'm impressed! Thinking green is great in this day and age. The 10-year agreement gives Carnival's fleet preferential rights in scheduling. Terminal 66 will remain open, so for now other line won't need to juggle their schedules.
October was a good month for airlines. Fuel costs came down, and because of reduced scheduling and fewer flights in the air, they posted an 86 percent "on time" rating. That's pretty good, when you consider there are still mechanical issues and weather issues that no one has control over. Let's see if they can keep it up for the Holidays....that may be too much of a Christmas wish, but I'm a positive kind of guy. Now if they could just give me my dang free peanuts back.
Last week sometime, I mentioned that Hawaii's tourism has taken a hit. Today, a new report is out that refers to a highly-specific, highly profitable area of tourism that has been hit even harder in Hawaii. Honeymoons. For decades, Hawaii was among THE places to go to get hitched, and some suppliers report having business virtually cut in half from last year. One local man who has been involved in the honeymoon trade for years, Pastor Penei Aller, said he's performed more baptisms than weddings. "That's never happened before," Aller was quoted as saying on USAToday.com. Like I said, Hawaii had better watch out and realize they need to stroke the tourism industry big-time. Otherwise, people will continue to flock to the much-closer-to-home spots like Mexico and The Caribbean.
Officer - Arrest that salesman! Oops, he's a cop too? In November, the Denver Police Department held its annual, and highly-profitable "seized contraband auction", where they earn money for the Department by auctioning/selling items confiscated from criminals during the previous year. This year, one of the items was a 1977 Oldsmobile Cutlass, which was bought by a 19-year-old woman for $350. Not sure if she was auditioning for MTV's Pimp My Ride or not, but there turned out to be an unexpected complication with the sale. After she made the legal purchase, then went on about her life, she was contacted by Police and informed that her "new" vehicle was actually still evidence in an active murder investigation. Police eventually confiscated the car back from her, noting the sweet ride still had bullet holes in the doors and fenders, a bloody interior and still contained scraps of blood-stained clothing. Furthermore, a second shooting victim who was in the car at the time of the murder survived, and was among the bidders at the auction. He dropped out when the price got over $300, but he later sold the winning bidder his spare key to the car for $40. The woman who purchased the car was either a Bonnie & Clyde aficionado, or had vision worse than Mr. Magoo! She received a full refund, and is rumored to be in the market for the original man-eating car from Steven King's "Christine".
The Associated Press ran an unusual story with a feel-good Holiday ending. Ms. Billie Watts, a 75-year-old Murfreesboro, Tennessee woman recently had to use the restroom in a Cracker Barrel restaurant. No, that's not the end of the story. Quit pushing me! Anyway, while she was in the stall, she noticed a tapestry bag hanging from a hook, and it appeared to be out of place and left there by someone. Mrs. Watts told The Murfreesboro Daily News Journal that she was a bit curious, so she peeked into the bag and discovered $97,000 in cash, in a bundle of neatly-stacked $1000 bills. She started looking through the bag for ID, to identify a possible owner, but there was nothing of the sort inside, except for a few anonymous photographs. Only money. She decided to take the new-found fortune home, to discuss with her husband what to do, but then decided to call Cracker Barrel back and ask if they had a "lost and found." She was told yes, but she decided to just give them her name and phone number, saying only if someone comes looking for a bag, call me. A woman called about 15 minutes later, saying she was the owner of the bag, and had no trouble identifying the pictures inside. It was obviously hers. Mrs. Watts returned the bag to the owner, whom she described as an elderly woman, but said she does not have the woman's last name or phone number. She said the woman merely told her that the money came from selling her home and her belongings, and that she was on her way to start a new life in Florida with her son. Watts said the woman offered a $1,000 reward, but she refused it. Grover Cleveland. That had to be exactly what you were thinking just now, "Whose face is on a $1000 bill, anyway?" Am I right? Am I right? You Betcha!
Full-time job: Cap'n.
Part-time job: Psychic.
Or is it Psychotic? I always get those two confused...
I'm impressed! Thinking green is great in this day and age. The 10-year agreement gives Carnival's fleet preferential rights in scheduling. Terminal 66 will remain open, so for now other line won't need to juggle their schedules.
October was a good month for airlines. Fuel costs came down, and because of reduced scheduling and fewer flights in the air, they posted an 86 percent "on time" rating. That's pretty good, when you consider there are still mechanical issues and weather issues that no one has control over. Let's see if they can keep it up for the Holidays....that may be too much of a Christmas wish, but I'm a positive kind of guy. Now if they could just give me my dang free peanuts back.
Last week sometime, I mentioned that Hawaii's tourism has taken a hit. Today, a new report is out that refers to a highly-specific, highly profitable area of tourism that has been hit even harder in Hawaii. Honeymoons. For decades, Hawaii was among THE places to go to get hitched, and some suppliers report having business virtually cut in half from last year. One local man who has been involved in the honeymoon trade for years, Pastor Penei Aller, said he's performed more baptisms than weddings. "That's never happened before," Aller was quoted as saying on USAToday.com. Like I said, Hawaii had better watch out and realize they need to stroke the tourism industry big-time. Otherwise, people will continue to flock to the much-closer-to-home spots like Mexico and The Caribbean.
Officer - Arrest that salesman! Oops, he's a cop too? In November, the Denver Police Department held its annual, and highly-profitable "seized contraband auction", where they earn money for the Department by auctioning/selling items confiscated from criminals during the previous year. This year, one of the items was a 1977 Oldsmobile Cutlass, which was bought by a 19-year-old woman for $350. Not sure if she was auditioning for MTV's Pimp My Ride or not, but there turned out to be an unexpected complication with the sale. After she made the legal purchase, then went on about her life, she was contacted by Police and informed that her "new" vehicle was actually still evidence in an active murder investigation. Police eventually confiscated the car back from her, noting the sweet ride still had bullet holes in the doors and fenders, a bloody interior and still contained scraps of blood-stained clothing. Furthermore, a second shooting victim who was in the car at the time of the murder survived, and was among the bidders at the auction. He dropped out when the price got over $300, but he later sold the winning bidder his spare key to the car for $40. The woman who purchased the car was either a Bonnie & Clyde aficionado, or had vision worse than Mr. Magoo! She received a full refund, and is rumored to be in the market for the original man-eating car from Steven King's "Christine".
The Associated Press ran an unusual story with a feel-good Holiday ending. Ms. Billie Watts, a 75-year-old Murfreesboro, Tennessee woman recently had to use the restroom in a Cracker Barrel restaurant. No, that's not the end of the story. Quit pushing me! Anyway, while she was in the stall, she noticed a tapestry bag hanging from a hook, and it appeared to be out of place and left there by someone. Mrs. Watts told The Murfreesboro Daily News Journal that she was a bit curious, so she peeked into the bag and discovered $97,000 in cash, in a bundle of neatly-stacked $1000 bills. She started looking through the bag for ID, to identify a possible owner, but there was nothing of the sort inside, except for a few anonymous photographs. Only money. She decided to take the new-found fortune home, to discuss with her husband what to do, but then decided to call Cracker Barrel back and ask if they had a "lost and found." She was told yes, but she decided to just give them her name and phone number, saying only if someone comes looking for a bag, call me. A woman called about 15 minutes later, saying she was the owner of the bag, and had no trouble identifying the pictures inside. It was obviously hers. Mrs. Watts returned the bag to the owner, whom she described as an elderly woman, but said she does not have the woman's last name or phone number. She said the woman merely told her that the money came from selling her home and her belongings, and that she was on her way to start a new life in Florida with her son. Watts said the woman offered a $1,000 reward, but she refused it. Grover Cleveland. That had to be exactly what you were thinking just now, "Whose face is on a $1000 bill, anyway?" Am I right? Am I right? You Betcha!
Full-time job: Cap'n.
Part-time job: Psychic.
Or is it Psychotic? I always get those two confused...
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Spoken Like A True Ostrich
There was some major news from some major cruise suppliers in the last 24 hours. Cunard, Princess, Oceania and Regent Seven Seas are among a half-dozen lines taking a stand against piracy in the Gulf of Aden. Their stance apparently is: Pirates? What pirates? All four major lines announced they will continue to sell (and sail) voyages through the Gulf of Aden, despite recent pirate attacks on cruise ships in the area. Certain upscale lines, such as Hapag-Lloyd have scrapped the idea until the situation improves. "We continue to believe there are adequate security measures in place to protect our vessels," says Cunard spokesperson Jackie Chase. Two Cunard ships, Queen Mary 2 and Queen Victoria, are scheduled to transit the Gulf of Aden in April as they circle the globe on world cruises. Princess spokesperson Julie Benson says, "At this point we are closely monitoring things, but have not made any changes to our program." Princess has two ships, Tahitian Princess and Royal Princess, scheduled to pass through the Gulf of Aden in April on world cruises as well. The issue is most pressing for Costa, which has a ship loaded with hundreds of vacationers scheduled to transit the area in just a few days. The Costa Classica, on her way from the Med to Dubai, is in the Red Sea today steaming Southward, and should arrive in the Gulf of Aden later this week. A spokesperson for Costa issued a statement saying the line plans to go ahead with the voyage while "carefully monitoring the situation." The statement further says the the line's ships are adequately equipped and its crews expertly trained. One major line that disagrees with the Ostrich head-in-the-sand treatment is Holland America. Their 'round-the-world voyages in 2009 and 2010 will now travel around the Southern tip of Africa, instead of the traditional route through the Suez Canal, Red Sea and Gulf of Aden. My 2 cents? GOOD FOR YOU, Holland America! Despite the rumors, there may still be signs of intelligent life in the cruise industry.
Increasingly-bold pirates have attacked 2 cruise ships in the Gulf of Aden in the past 2 weeks, as I blogged previously. No one was injured in either incident, but how many times can people get lucky? Unfortunately, ships' Captains likely have no say in the matter. It's corporate pressure to maintain a set itinerary, to avoid passenger complaints. Frankly, that's not what contestants on Family Feud would call "Good answer!" As soon as dollar signs flash in the forefront of potential passenger safety, this Cap'n gets wrankled and majorly angry. When I used to work cruise ships myself, I often told people we were able to succeed DESPITE the home office, not because of them. Let's all hope and pray the affected ships have success in this dangerous area, despite their corporate decision-making. Another industry voice, C.L.I.A. (the Cruise Lines International Association), will not discuss the issue of piracy in the region. Their silence speaks volumes, if you ask me.
When you think of airports, you normally think stress and headaches. A new article from Health Magazine says all airports are not created equal! In fact, they ranked the Top 10 healthiest airports, based on services and amenities that promote healthy living and a lack of stress. Phoenix Sky Harbor is America's healthiest airport, according to the magazine. The criteria included food, relaxation zones, walking paths, music, lighting, environmental programs and safety technology. Industry data and a panel of experts were used in compiling the list. Phoenix was cited for its "healthful" restaurants, video-paging system, two pet parks and clean bathrooms. Here are the other 9 and the amenities cited by ranking:
• Baltimore/Washington (soft music and lighting, a spa and a hiking path near the airport).
• Chicago O'Hare (healthy restaurant food, children's play areas and the fitness facility in its on-site Hilton Hotel).
• Detroit Metropolitan ("storm-ready" police officers and employees who are trained as bad-weather spotters, healthy restaurant food).
• Denver (solar energy panels, recycling of de-icing fluids, an art collection, free Wi-Fi and healthy restaurant food).
• Ronald Reagan Washington National (an art collection, a walking and biking trail).
• Dallas/Fort Worth (children's play areas, hybrid/CNG vehicles, healthy restaurant food).
• Boston Logan (environmental initiatives, CNG shuttle buses).
• Portland, Ore. (a paved bicycle and walking path, covered bicycle parking, local musicians playing in the terminals).
• Philadelphia (a health clinic, free Wi-Fi on weekends).
Hey - where's my hometown, Charlotte NC? We have rocking chairs! That's right, you can walk through the main concourse and have a seat in a nice wooden rocker to waste - I mean spend time while you're waiting on Godot. Or your flight. Oh well, I'm sure if we didn't make the Top 10 we were #11. Or at least in the Top 250, give or take. Did I mention we have rocking chairs? Oh yeah, and a NASCAR Cafe!
A Spokane woman and her mother have been convicted in federal court, on charges of sneaking a rhesus monkey into the United States from Thailand. Gypsy Lawson, 29, hid the sedated young rhesus macaque under her blouse, pretending to be pregnant when she passed through U.S. Customs in LA after a trip to Bangkok, Thailand. Her mother, Fran Ogren of Northport, Washington also went on the trip, and was named a co-conspirator. The two women were found guilty Monday by a 12-member jury on separate charges of conspiracy and smuggling goods into the United States. The monkey is now at a primate rescue facility in Oregon. Can't you just hear it? "That's a real nice prehensile tail on your baby there, Ma'am..."
How far would you go, if you thought you were in the right? A retired New York City man says he has spent $7,500 fighting a $115 parking ticket because he's got "nothing else to do." Former electrical hardware firm vice president Simon Belsky says he was erroneously ticketed two years ago. The 63-year-old says the ticket cites his van for blocking a Brooklyn fire hydrant, even though the only hydrant on the street was halfway down the block. The November 2006 fine has ballooned from $115 to about $200 with penalties. Belsky was in court last week and is due back Feb. 2. He says if he wins, he'll file a civil suit against the city to recover the $7,500 he's spent on legal work. He says if any compensation is awarded he'll donate it to educational programs. I don't know about you, but I like this guy!
Increasingly-bold pirates have attacked 2 cruise ships in the Gulf of Aden in the past 2 weeks, as I blogged previously. No one was injured in either incident, but how many times can people get lucky? Unfortunately, ships' Captains likely have no say in the matter. It's corporate pressure to maintain a set itinerary, to avoid passenger complaints. Frankly, that's not what contestants on Family Feud would call "Good answer!" As soon as dollar signs flash in the forefront of potential passenger safety, this Cap'n gets wrankled and majorly angry. When I used to work cruise ships myself, I often told people we were able to succeed DESPITE the home office, not because of them. Let's all hope and pray the affected ships have success in this dangerous area, despite their corporate decision-making. Another industry voice, C.L.I.A. (the Cruise Lines International Association), will not discuss the issue of piracy in the region. Their silence speaks volumes, if you ask me.
When you think of airports, you normally think stress and headaches. A new article from Health Magazine says all airports are not created equal! In fact, they ranked the Top 10 healthiest airports, based on services and amenities that promote healthy living and a lack of stress. Phoenix Sky Harbor is America's healthiest airport, according to the magazine. The criteria included food, relaxation zones, walking paths, music, lighting, environmental programs and safety technology. Industry data and a panel of experts were used in compiling the list. Phoenix was cited for its "healthful" restaurants, video-paging system, two pet parks and clean bathrooms. Here are the other 9 and the amenities cited by ranking:
• Baltimore/Washington (soft music and lighting, a spa and a hiking path near the airport).
• Chicago O'Hare (healthy restaurant food, children's play areas and the fitness facility in its on-site Hilton Hotel).
• Detroit Metropolitan ("storm-ready" police officers and employees who are trained as bad-weather spotters, healthy restaurant food).
• Denver (solar energy panels, recycling of de-icing fluids, an art collection, free Wi-Fi and healthy restaurant food).
• Ronald Reagan Washington National (an art collection, a walking and biking trail).
• Dallas/Fort Worth (children's play areas, hybrid/CNG vehicles, healthy restaurant food).
• Boston Logan (environmental initiatives, CNG shuttle buses).
• Portland, Ore. (a paved bicycle and walking path, covered bicycle parking, local musicians playing in the terminals).
• Philadelphia (a health clinic, free Wi-Fi on weekends).
Hey - where's my hometown, Charlotte NC? We have rocking chairs! That's right, you can walk through the main concourse and have a seat in a nice wooden rocker to waste - I mean spend time while you're waiting on Godot. Or your flight. Oh well, I'm sure if we didn't make the Top 10 we were #11. Or at least in the Top 250, give or take. Did I mention we have rocking chairs? Oh yeah, and a NASCAR Cafe!
A Spokane woman and her mother have been convicted in federal court, on charges of sneaking a rhesus monkey into the United States from Thailand. Gypsy Lawson, 29, hid the sedated young rhesus macaque under her blouse, pretending to be pregnant when she passed through U.S. Customs in LA after a trip to Bangkok, Thailand. Her mother, Fran Ogren of Northport, Washington also went on the trip, and was named a co-conspirator. The two women were found guilty Monday by a 12-member jury on separate charges of conspiracy and smuggling goods into the United States. The monkey is now at a primate rescue facility in Oregon. Can't you just hear it? "That's a real nice prehensile tail on your baby there, Ma'am..."
How far would you go, if you thought you were in the right? A retired New York City man says he has spent $7,500 fighting a $115 parking ticket because he's got "nothing else to do." Former electrical hardware firm vice president Simon Belsky says he was erroneously ticketed two years ago. The 63-year-old says the ticket cites his van for blocking a Brooklyn fire hydrant, even though the only hydrant on the street was halfway down the block. The November 2006 fine has ballooned from $115 to about $200 with penalties. Belsky was in court last week and is due back Feb. 2. He says if he wins, he'll file a civil suit against the city to recover the $7,500 he's spent on legal work. He says if any compensation is awarded he'll donate it to educational programs. I don't know about you, but I like this guy!
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Frozen Daiquiris - Extreme Edition
Most of the time, unless you read travel blogs or watch the Travel Channel, the world spins around and people take cruises, virtually unnoticed. Invariably, the only time you hear news reports about cruising is when something BAD happens. Then again, that's what 99 percent of all news is these days, so it shouldn't surprise anyone. Well, today the poor media had to actually report something good. Their in-exuberance was tempered by the fact that the GOOD has to do with the BAD.
A couple of days ago it was a reported that a "cruise ship" was stranded off the coast of South America near Antarctica, after running aground and taking on water in a fierce storm, which also punctured two diesel fuel tanks. Anyone who saw that report immediately pictures in their mind's eye some great big, beautiful ship from Princess, Royal Caribbean, etc. Well, not so much. The ship is the Panamanian-flagged, Argentinian owned Ushuaia, now operated by Antarpply Expeditions. What? You never heard of them? Or of that ship? Don't feel badly...that makes you a member of a VERY large club. The Ushuaia is a cruise ship in the loosest sense, compared to what most Americans have experienced. Very small (only 88 passengers and 34 crew), and old (she would have been 39 years old this year) the MV Ushuaia used to be a research vessel for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. Whether or not they serve frozen daiquiris, I can't truthfully say. But suffice it to say she's not your normal cruise ship. Many adventurous people opt for the up-close-and-personal experience of this type of ship, but when doing that you face potential issues, based on most of those expedition-style ships being substantially older vessels. Unfortunately, the ship is leaking oil and the thought of sludge-covered penguins is NOT what the tourism people want to see. Nor any of us, for that matter.
Oh yeah, I mentioned there was good news: All 122 people aboard the ship have been evacuated, and are in perfect health, according to the Chilean navy Friday. 2 helicopters and 2 Chilean navy ships were dispatched to the scene, though the Ushuaia was never in danger of sinking, a spokesman said. Passengers were transferred to the Achilles, the first ship to arrive, which carried them toward the Chilean base Eduardo Frei. The not-so-happy campers on board included 14 Danes, 12 Americans, 11 Australians, 9 Germans, 7 Argentines, 7 British, 6 Chinese, 6 Spaniards, 5 Swiss, 3 Italians, 2 French, 2 Canadians, 2 Irish, 1 Belgian, and 1 New Zealander. It cannot be confirmed that there were 5 golden rings, or a partridge in a pear tree still on board. The crew of the Lautaro, the second ship to reach the crippled Ushuaia, was working to stem the fuel leak, again according to Chilean navy sources.
Don't misunderstand, I think there is definitely a market for exotic, destination-type cruising, and sometimes the only way to experience the full adventure is on a smaller vessel. I've just become less and less attached to the notion of "historic" ships (another kind word for old). Even if they can all pass their SOLAS, Safety Of Life At Sea inspections, the risk factor increases the longer ships stay in service. Period. Don't write me letters about outstanding maintenance and such, there comes a time when technology trumps history. Anyone who calls me about this sort of trip will get the full story - pluses and minuses before they book anything. There are lots of salesmen who will do anything to get your credit card and complete a sale. Not me. The most important thing for me is not selling you a trip. It's selling you the right trip, so not only will I have your business over and over, but you'll tell your friends to call me too. That's what it's all about in a service industry.
Hearing about the fierce storm, and other acts of God, brought me to another story. Police say Michael E. Schwab of San Antonio, Texas claimed that while he was driving on U.S. Highway 281 recently, God told him to run a woman off the road because she "wasn't driving right" and "needed to be taken off the road." He slammed into her car at over 100 miles per hour, spinning both vehicles into the median."God must have been with them, 'cause any other time, the severity of this crash, it would have been a fatal," said Kyle Coleman, a spokesman for the Bexar County sheriff's department. Police say Schwab was not drunk, and they found no drugs inside his car. He is expected to undergo a psychiatric evaluation. Thankfully, neither individual suffered serious injuries.
God has faced scrutiny in the past, including a recent lawsuit that was thrown out of court in Nebraska. A judge dismissed a lawsuit in October that was filed against The Higher Power. That's right, somebody tried to sue God (forgetting that old "whatever comes around, goes around" thing). In 2007, Nebraska state Senator Ernie Chambers, who represents legislative District 11 in North Omaha, filed the lawsuit alleging God was responsible for "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants." NOTE TO DISTRICT 11 RESIDENTS: Eh, this is the best you can do at finding somebody to represent you in the State Senate? If there were no superior applicants, how about next time just mailing in a brief statement, indicating you'd like to secede from the Union or something. As you might suspect, God was not available for immediate comment, but He has some interesting ways of using fire and brimstone, which Senator Chambers may discuss with Him at a later date....
A couple of days ago it was a reported that a "cruise ship" was stranded off the coast of South America near Antarctica, after running aground and taking on water in a fierce storm, which also punctured two diesel fuel tanks. Anyone who saw that report immediately pictures in their mind's eye some great big, beautiful ship from Princess, Royal Caribbean, etc. Well, not so much. The ship is the Panamanian-flagged, Argentinian owned Ushuaia, now operated by Antarpply Expeditions. What? You never heard of them? Or of that ship? Don't feel badly...that makes you a member of a VERY large club. The Ushuaia is a cruise ship in the loosest sense, compared to what most Americans have experienced. Very small (only 88 passengers and 34 crew), and old (she would have been 39 years old this year) the MV Ushuaia used to be a research vessel for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. Whether or not they serve frozen daiquiris, I can't truthfully say. But suffice it to say she's not your normal cruise ship. Many adventurous people opt for the up-close-and-personal experience of this type of ship, but when doing that you face potential issues, based on most of those expedition-style ships being substantially older vessels. Unfortunately, the ship is leaking oil and the thought of sludge-covered penguins is NOT what the tourism people want to see. Nor any of us, for that matter.
Oh yeah, I mentioned there was good news: All 122 people aboard the ship have been evacuated, and are in perfect health, according to the Chilean navy Friday. 2 helicopters and 2 Chilean navy ships were dispatched to the scene, though the Ushuaia was never in danger of sinking, a spokesman said. Passengers were transferred to the Achilles, the first ship to arrive, which carried them toward the Chilean base Eduardo Frei. The not-so-happy campers on board included 14 Danes, 12 Americans, 11 Australians, 9 Germans, 7 Argentines, 7 British, 6 Chinese, 6 Spaniards, 5 Swiss, 3 Italians, 2 French, 2 Canadians, 2 Irish, 1 Belgian, and 1 New Zealander. It cannot be confirmed that there were 5 golden rings, or a partridge in a pear tree still on board. The crew of the Lautaro, the second ship to reach the crippled Ushuaia, was working to stem the fuel leak, again according to Chilean navy sources.
Don't misunderstand, I think there is definitely a market for exotic, destination-type cruising, and sometimes the only way to experience the full adventure is on a smaller vessel. I've just become less and less attached to the notion of "historic" ships (another kind word for old). Even if they can all pass their SOLAS, Safety Of Life At Sea inspections, the risk factor increases the longer ships stay in service. Period. Don't write me letters about outstanding maintenance and such, there comes a time when technology trumps history. Anyone who calls me about this sort of trip will get the full story - pluses and minuses before they book anything. There are lots of salesmen who will do anything to get your credit card and complete a sale. Not me. The most important thing for me is not selling you a trip. It's selling you the right trip, so not only will I have your business over and over, but you'll tell your friends to call me too. That's what it's all about in a service industry.
Hearing about the fierce storm, and other acts of God, brought me to another story. Police say Michael E. Schwab of San Antonio, Texas claimed that while he was driving on U.S. Highway 281 recently, God told him to run a woman off the road because she "wasn't driving right" and "needed to be taken off the road." He slammed into her car at over 100 miles per hour, spinning both vehicles into the median."God must have been with them, 'cause any other time, the severity of this crash, it would have been a fatal," said Kyle Coleman, a spokesman for the Bexar County sheriff's department. Police say Schwab was not drunk, and they found no drugs inside his car. He is expected to undergo a psychiatric evaluation. Thankfully, neither individual suffered serious injuries.
God has faced scrutiny in the past, including a recent lawsuit that was thrown out of court in Nebraska. A judge dismissed a lawsuit in October that was filed against The Higher Power. That's right, somebody tried to sue God (forgetting that old "whatever comes around, goes around" thing). In 2007, Nebraska state Senator Ernie Chambers, who represents legislative District 11 in North Omaha, filed the lawsuit alleging God was responsible for "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants." NOTE TO DISTRICT 11 RESIDENTS: Eh, this is the best you can do at finding somebody to represent you in the State Senate? If there were no superior applicants, how about next time just mailing in a brief statement, indicating you'd like to secede from the Union or something. As you might suspect, God was not available for immediate comment, but He has some interesting ways of using fire and brimstone, which Senator Chambers may discuss with Him at a later date....
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