On CNN and USAToday, they have people employed as travel writers to maintain a section, and they sometimes get caught up in the "slow news day" syndrome. Whenever that happens, you can bet they'll be reporting about some new Top 10 list for travel. Top 10 places to roller skate with a kangaroo, that sort of thing. Today I noticed Budget Travel has a 2009 Top 10 destination section. Included are places like Austin Texas (huh?). Don't get me wrong, I'm from Dallas originally and Austin is a cool little city and has some great blues clubs and barbecue. But Top 10 destination material might just raise an eyebrow or three. They mentioned the US Dollar goes further in Hungary and Iceland than it used to. Yep. I'm sure that's true, but it costs a wee dollar or two to get there, so the savings could be counter-balanced by flight expenditure. But I'm not complaining, at least those sound more like Top 10 travel site material than lil' old Austin TX. Washington DC made the list, which is sensible with the plethora of sightseeing opportunities, museums, etc. So did Hawaii, which I've touted in previous blogs as having more bargains than usual and of course "no passport required." Other places making the list were Berlin Germany, since it's the 20th anniversary of the Berlin Wall coming down, Vancouver Canada which will play host to the 2010 winter Olympics, and just about anywhere in Mexico. Overall, not a bad list, and of course Mann Travels can help you get to these or any other destinations of choice.
NKOB. No, I didn't mis-spell "knob", it's a rumor that surfaced on USAToday's travel section, about a New Kids On The Block theme cruise to the Bahamas in May. No details are out yet, but that sure seems like a stretch to me. I thought they were trying to keep people from jumping overboard these days, not encourage it....
A Pennsylvania couple is behind bars after police say they failed to call their bank, when a computer glitch accidentally put an extra $175,000 in their account. Authorities say 50-year-old Randy Pratt and 36-year-old Melissa Pratt instead withdrew the money, quit their jobs and moved to Florida. They were buying a house in the Orlando area when the mistake was discovered and traced. The two were arraigned and jailed Tuesday, on theft and other charges. Bail was set at $100,000. Seems the Pratts made a deposit last summer, a check for $1,772.50 which showed up in their FNB Bank account as $177,250 due to a typing error. Police say Mrs. Pratt indicated to them that her husband, a roofing installer, often got large checks for his work, and she simply wasn't aware of any error. Yeah, I'm thinking she might have noticed if the memo section of the check said something like "for services rendered, to put a roof over the entire state of Delaware."
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to ME?? A 26-year-old man and his father were arrested by an off-duty Muncie Indiana police officer, after the man cut in line at Wal-Mart. The police report said Edward R. Pluhar Jr., of Frankfort, cut to the front of the line at the Wal-Mart service desk on Sunday. What he didn't know was that in line ahead of him was off-duty Officer Chris Kirby. Kirby asked Mr. Pluhar to wait his turn, and he refused. Then Pluhar's father, 61-year-old Edward R. Pluhar Sr., asked Kirby if he wanted to step outside. That's when Kirby identified himself as a police officer, and explained that offering to fight could bring the men up on charges. Apparently the Wal-Mart employees kept serving the Pluhars, just trying to get them out of the way quickly, and when Kirby went out to the parking lot after his transaction, the Pluhar gents followed him into the parking lot, where they scuffled. Other officers arrived on the scene and the Pluhars were both arrested. It's one thing to be rude. It's quite another to knowingly assault a police officer to prove your manhood. I hope they were at least able to swap out that George Foreman grill so the trip wasn't a complete waste!
Interesting Divorce Court ruling from the Palm Beach Post in Florida....By a 2-1 vote, a Florida appeals court ruled that Andrew Craissati could stop paying alimony to his ex-wife. The couple's agreement called for alimony only until the wife either remarried, or was "cohabiting" with another person for at least three months. The fast-thinking Mr. Craissati pointed out to a judge that his ex-wife, recently convicted of a serious DUI offense, is now "cohabiting" with a cellmate in prison. At 3 months and 1 day, the Court ruled in his favor. Now there's a Perry Mason moment if I ever heard one!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Monkey See, Cruiser Do
Today we got another report of a man overboard, this time in the South Pacific off the coast of Vanuatu (famous from the Survivor episodes filmed there). Thank heaven, the media has now started calling them JUMPERS instead of insinuating people are accidentally falling overboard all the time. This particular 22-year old chap was on a P&O ship, and reports are that he and friends were seen partying heavily, before he leaped over the railing into the water. Lucky for him, the ship made an immediate turn, and within 45 minutes he was rescued and in perfect health. Even luckier, the Great White Sharks in the area are either really slow swimmers, or had a sinus infection and didn't pick up his scent...or maybe they just don't like the smell of cheap Bourbon. It's hard to tell, but this is a frustrating side of cruising that can't go away quickly enough, in my opinion.
Sorry I've been too busy to write the last few days, but January and February are the "Super Bowl" of booking in the travel business. Every human on the planet has just found out their vacation schedule for the year after January 1st, and the crush is on to get something booked. It's a phenomenon known as Wave Season (historically because of the large number of cruise requests), though we are seeing just as many people booking all-inclusive trips these days. Although the economy has hit the quick-getaway traveler, the people who go for a week or more are still booking like nothing has happened. That's good for our business, and with some of the excellent deals out there right now, you too can take advantage. In the stock market, it's BUY LOW, SELL HIGH. Right now it's TRAVEL LOW. Believe me, when the economy starts to boom again, all these vendors are going to raise their rates to not only make a profit again, but try to recoup some of what they lost. That means if you can travel now, the world is your oyster. I never understood that saying, since I don't like oysters. How about the world is your jelly-doughnut (thank you, Elvis). Or the world is your double-fudge brownie. Whatever YOUR world is, call me and let's get you booked to go visit more of it!!
Recently, the Georgia Department of Natural Resources was seeking approximately 75 volunteers, to be trained in the fine art of frog listening. Huh? Apparently Georgia has an annual frog survey, and they were having difficulty completing the task. It turns out the state has 31 different frog species, each with a distinctive ribbit and/or croak. The surveyors, after practicing detection to be able to identify all 31, would monitor frog habitats to help officials measure population trends. Gee. You mean they were having trouble finding VOLUNTEERS for this? Maybe if it's that important, you might want to offer some cold hard cash. Even then, locating 75 people who have what I like to call "no life" will be difficult. Make it a 6-figure job, instead of a 31-frogger volunteer program, and just maybe you'll get people to Kermit (commit - get it?).
And you think WE'RE tough on crime? Canadian citizen Robert Christianson, 64, was arrested recently, upon his arrival at Tampa International Airport. His name came up on an international criminal watch-list, and he was held and bound over on two arrest warrants issued by Canadian customs officials. When I first read this, I thought WOW - sounds like this guy needs to be off the street, and I feel safer knowing he's in custody. Then I read further about what Christianson was being sought for, back in Canada:
1) Allowing his dog to run at large.
2) Having no valid license tag for his dog.
There were international rumors floating that he might be wanted for the trifecta, the 3rd part being "Failure to scoop le poop", but as of this writing it cannot be substantiated.
A suburban Chicago couple really believes it's never too late for love. Dorothy Taylor, 84, and Duane Williams, 82, were married Saturday at a Tinley Park independent living center, after what family members describe as a "whirlwind" courtship. The two have been friends and bridge partners for about a year, but the romance started to bloom around Christmas, according to 84-year-old best man Walter Urbanik. That was when Williams got the nerve to kiss Taylor. The two decided to marry within a week. "When you're 84 and 82, you don't need a long engagement," Duane said. He was never an impulsive man, but was inspired by "the spark of love," said his son Tom Williams. Taylor wore a light brown satin gown with a jacket, and was walked down the aisle by her 16-year-old grandson Vince Laneve of Chicago. The only unfortunate part was when the Reverend asked "Do you take this woman, 'til death do you part?" and Duane looked at his watch....
Sorry I've been too busy to write the last few days, but January and February are the "Super Bowl" of booking in the travel business. Every human on the planet has just found out their vacation schedule for the year after January 1st, and the crush is on to get something booked. It's a phenomenon known as Wave Season (historically because of the large number of cruise requests), though we are seeing just as many people booking all-inclusive trips these days. Although the economy has hit the quick-getaway traveler, the people who go for a week or more are still booking like nothing has happened. That's good for our business, and with some of the excellent deals out there right now, you too can take advantage. In the stock market, it's BUY LOW, SELL HIGH. Right now it's TRAVEL LOW. Believe me, when the economy starts to boom again, all these vendors are going to raise their rates to not only make a profit again, but try to recoup some of what they lost. That means if you can travel now, the world is your oyster. I never understood that saying, since I don't like oysters. How about the world is your jelly-doughnut (thank you, Elvis). Or the world is your double-fudge brownie. Whatever YOUR world is, call me and let's get you booked to go visit more of it!!
Recently, the Georgia Department of Natural Resources was seeking approximately 75 volunteers, to be trained in the fine art of frog listening. Huh? Apparently Georgia has an annual frog survey, and they were having difficulty completing the task. It turns out the state has 31 different frog species, each with a distinctive ribbit and/or croak. The surveyors, after practicing detection to be able to identify all 31, would monitor frog habitats to help officials measure population trends. Gee. You mean they were having trouble finding VOLUNTEERS for this? Maybe if it's that important, you might want to offer some cold hard cash. Even then, locating 75 people who have what I like to call "no life" will be difficult. Make it a 6-figure job, instead of a 31-frogger volunteer program, and just maybe you'll get people to Kermit (commit - get it?).
And you think WE'RE tough on crime? Canadian citizen Robert Christianson, 64, was arrested recently, upon his arrival at Tampa International Airport. His name came up on an international criminal watch-list, and he was held and bound over on two arrest warrants issued by Canadian customs officials. When I first read this, I thought WOW - sounds like this guy needs to be off the street, and I feel safer knowing he's in custody. Then I read further about what Christianson was being sought for, back in Canada:
1) Allowing his dog to run at large.
2) Having no valid license tag for his dog.
There were international rumors floating that he might be wanted for the trifecta, the 3rd part being "Failure to scoop le poop", but as of this writing it cannot be substantiated.
A suburban Chicago couple really believes it's never too late for love. Dorothy Taylor, 84, and Duane Williams, 82, were married Saturday at a Tinley Park independent living center, after what family members describe as a "whirlwind" courtship. The two have been friends and bridge partners for about a year, but the romance started to bloom around Christmas, according to 84-year-old best man Walter Urbanik. That was when Williams got the nerve to kiss Taylor. The two decided to marry within a week. "When you're 84 and 82, you don't need a long engagement," Duane said. He was never an impulsive man, but was inspired by "the spark of love," said his son Tom Williams. Taylor wore a light brown satin gown with a jacket, and was walked down the aisle by her 16-year-old grandson Vince Laneve of Chicago. The only unfortunate part was when the Reverend asked "Do you take this woman, 'til death do you part?" and Duane looked at his watch....
Thursday, January 8, 2009
"Culture Vultures?"
also known as "How dare you come to our impoverished island to spend exorbitant sums of money, dramatically boosting our otherwise-stagnant economy, dressed like THAT?!" Over the last few years, a number of Caribbean islands have taken steps (theoretically at least) to upgrade the caliber of visitors they get. Some of the time, I understand. Barbados was one of the first islands to outlaw camouflage clothing. It seems to make visual sense, making it much easier to spot terrorist activities, or potential "gang-related" activities if that's the garb of choice. That is, if terrorists or gang members are willing to cooperate by identifying themselves as such by wearing "camo." The islands of Antigua and Barbuda followed suit. Initially it was an idea born of reason, but it didn't take long for unreasonableness to rear its ugly head. A woman who had flown to Barbados for vacation was stunned, when a Customs agent confiscated her pink bikini. Luckily, she wasn't wearing it at the time! Turns out, it was something she bought at the mall called "fashion camo", and although it was certainly a camouflage pattern, it was in shades of hot pink. Personally, I'm not scared of terrorists who would attempt to take over the world in pink bikinis, but maybe that's just the old sailor in me talkin'. Regardless, don't allow yourself to spend any time in a Caribbean prison because you wanted to be fashionably cool.
Which brings me to today's rant, about the Culture Vultures on the lovely island of Grenada. Recently, some cruise ship passengers got off to unload their wallets on this quaint spice island, and they were rounded up and escorted back to the ship. Because they were wearing their pants too low. If you're reading this in the United States, and you have a teenager, or know a teenager, or were ever a teenager, or know somebody who has a teenager, you know that as RIDICULOUS as that style is, it's what "the young people" are doing, strongly influenced by what they see in the rap music community. Low-riding will likely go down in history along such fashion faux pas as terrible hairdos (such as the mullet or the white-guy-oversized-afro), leisure suits (available in lime green or puce), or Nehru jackets (unless you happened to be Nehru, in which case it was pretty cool). But I'm in serious doubt that terrorists are coming ashore with their skivvy's hanging out the back of their jeans, listening to Lil' Wayne or Kanye West. These are the kids from the cruise ship, who belong to the PARENTS WHO ARE ON THEIR WAY TO YOUR ROLEX SHOP EVEN AS WE SPEAK. Seeing their kids ushered back to the ship by police tends to put a damper on removing that American Express card from the wallet, don't you know. Granted some churches will not allow tourists in with shorts or tube tops, and you'll get me to understand religious grievance long before I'll get the holier-than-thou attitude of some of the local officials. Oh yeah -- make yourself a note, Mr. Official. You have teenagers on your island as well, and they pretty much follow US culture patterns, about a year behind the times. Get ready to be rounding up locals by this time in 2010. Or maybe you could just welcome visitors who are freely supporting your economy, while trying to enjoy their vacation. Just a thought.
"Someone's knockin' at the door. Somebody's ringin' the bell. Do me favor, open the door, and let 'em in." Thank you Paul McCartney. Good thing for you, you don't happen to live in Scranton, Pennsylvania. An eastern Pennsylvania man is facing up to 37 years in prison, for knockin' at the door a little too robustly. Police say 34-year-old Robert Kane went to neighbor Jamie Zaleski's apartment, because he was angry about a friend of Zaleski's who parked in front of his house across the street. Police said Zaleski went to the door and asked, "Who is it?" to which Mr. Kane replied "Open the door, or I'll cut it down." When Zaleski and his friends decided the man sounded too worked up to open the door, they declined his offer. A minute later, Kane fired up his chain saw and began cutting through the wooden door. Zaleski and his friends ran out the back way and called police. A jury convicted Kane on Tuesday, of charges including attempted burglary, attempted criminal trespass and terroristic threats. You have to sympathize with Mr. Kane though, being put through the torture of having somebody actually park on the street in front of his house. I mean, THE NERVE of these people!!
Everyone is looking at ways to tighten their belts, including art galleries. It takes a lot of money to bring featured exhibits to town, and in Ashland, Oregon patrons of the arts are getting creative. City Councilor Eric Navickas, who recently opened an art gallery in town, decided to keep up with the news in a fund-raising effort. He and partner Amy Godard invited guests to their grand opening, where they found an enormous photo of President George W. Bush and lots of shoes. People paid $1 per shot, to have the soles of the sneakers, boots and sandals dipped in red paint, before people fired the footwear at the image of our beloved Prez. Funds raised at Friday's opening went toward future gallery exhibits, and everyone seemed to enjoy the bonus exercise. One participant, 91-yr-old Marjorie Mather, came back for seconds and thirds. Wouldn't you?
Which brings me to today's rant, about the Culture Vultures on the lovely island of Grenada. Recently, some cruise ship passengers got off to unload their wallets on this quaint spice island, and they were rounded up and escorted back to the ship. Because they were wearing their pants too low. If you're reading this in the United States, and you have a teenager, or know a teenager, or were ever a teenager, or know somebody who has a teenager, you know that as RIDICULOUS as that style is, it's what "the young people" are doing, strongly influenced by what they see in the rap music community. Low-riding will likely go down in history along such fashion faux pas as terrible hairdos (such as the mullet or the white-guy-oversized-afro), leisure suits (available in lime green or puce), or Nehru jackets (unless you happened to be Nehru, in which case it was pretty cool). But I'm in serious doubt that terrorists are coming ashore with their skivvy's hanging out the back of their jeans, listening to Lil' Wayne or Kanye West. These are the kids from the cruise ship, who belong to the PARENTS WHO ARE ON THEIR WAY TO YOUR ROLEX SHOP EVEN AS WE SPEAK. Seeing their kids ushered back to the ship by police tends to put a damper on removing that American Express card from the wallet, don't you know. Granted some churches will not allow tourists in with shorts or tube tops, and you'll get me to understand religious grievance long before I'll get the holier-than-thou attitude of some of the local officials. Oh yeah -- make yourself a note, Mr. Official. You have teenagers on your island as well, and they pretty much follow US culture patterns, about a year behind the times. Get ready to be rounding up locals by this time in 2010. Or maybe you could just welcome visitors who are freely supporting your economy, while trying to enjoy their vacation. Just a thought.
"Someone's knockin' at the door. Somebody's ringin' the bell. Do me favor, open the door, and let 'em in." Thank you Paul McCartney. Good thing for you, you don't happen to live in Scranton, Pennsylvania. An eastern Pennsylvania man is facing up to 37 years in prison, for knockin' at the door a little too robustly. Police say 34-year-old Robert Kane went to neighbor Jamie Zaleski's apartment, because he was angry about a friend of Zaleski's who parked in front of his house across the street. Police said Zaleski went to the door and asked, "Who is it?" to which Mr. Kane replied "Open the door, or I'll cut it down." When Zaleski and his friends decided the man sounded too worked up to open the door, they declined his offer. A minute later, Kane fired up his chain saw and began cutting through the wooden door. Zaleski and his friends ran out the back way and called police. A jury convicted Kane on Tuesday, of charges including attempted burglary, attempted criminal trespass and terroristic threats. You have to sympathize with Mr. Kane though, being put through the torture of having somebody actually park on the street in front of his house. I mean, THE NERVE of these people!!
Everyone is looking at ways to tighten their belts, including art galleries. It takes a lot of money to bring featured exhibits to town, and in Ashland, Oregon patrons of the arts are getting creative. City Councilor Eric Navickas, who recently opened an art gallery in town, decided to keep up with the news in a fund-raising effort. He and partner Amy Godard invited guests to their grand opening, where they found an enormous photo of President George W. Bush and lots of shoes. People paid $1 per shot, to have the soles of the sneakers, boots and sandals dipped in red paint, before people fired the footwear at the image of our beloved Prez. Funds raised at Friday's opening went toward future gallery exhibits, and everyone seemed to enjoy the bonus exercise. One participant, 91-yr-old Marjorie Mather, came back for seconds and thirds. Wouldn't you?
Monday, January 5, 2009
Death By Coinage?
Ever heard the term "nickeled and dimed to death?" For decades, that was a saying that was geared towards the hotel industry, who would entice people in with low fares, then stack, pack and rack up charges for everything short of breathing. It was one of the biggest advantages cruise lines had, by telling people to come-on-down, relax and have your meals and most services included in the fare. We're not talking about the recently-imposed-then-relaxed fuel supplements. Those were not only explainable, but completely understandable and unavoidable, based on the rocketing fuel costs from last Fall. One of the last great freebies has fallen, though, on Royal Caribbean cruise line. You could always sell people on the relaxed atmosphere, and the fact that if people weren't in the mood to go to the dining room, they could order room service complimentary. Royal Caribbean has decided to nix that notion on all room delivery requests after 12pm midnight. They are now adding a "service fee" of $3.95 per order. Cap'n Bob has another name for the fee: RIDICULOUS! It's not like they're having to hire extra people for late-night duty or pay them a shift differential. Crewmembers work on salary, and they work when they're told and where they're told. You wanna know what this is? It's a sneak-attack on another free onboard service. If they get away with this, without passengers raising holy Heck about it, it won't be just after midnight any more. It'll be all day every day. It'll be another nail in the coffin of excess greed that is stagnating the industry. It'll be another reason for people to price and purchase an all-inclusive vacation island trip, instead of worrying about being buried alive under a pile of nickels and dimes. Way to go Royal Caribbean. You're being a trend-setter once again, but I neither applaud you for it or wish you the best with it. I'm personally hoping it's a dismal failure, and you go back to being a class act with the sense of history to remember what got you on that lofty perch in the first place.
A 57-year-old man in Missoula, Montana man says he is lucky to be alive today, after accidentally crashing his bicycle. You'd probably figure he crashed into what - a car? A wall? Maybe a dog? No, middle-school teacher Jim Litz said he often sees wild bears during his daily commute home along a dirt road, but he wasn't paying close enough attention the other day and ran headlong into the side of a large black bear that had wandered into his path. The local newspaper, the Missoula Missoulian (nice name - very original), quoted Mr. Litz as saying “I didn’t have time to respond, or even hit my brakes.” He said the impact flipped him off his bike, at which point the bear began clawing at him, apparently in confusion and anger. The attack left Litz with scratches and bruises over most of his body, but he holds no ill will toward the animal. I'd bet if we interviewed the animal, he'd hold plenty of ill will towards Jim Litz! "Dang that hurt - maybe I oughta kill somebody...."
Everybody sing along: "A THREE HOUR TOUR...." Yes, we have a Gilligan-related travel incident to report. Robert Vassallo and his girlfriend, Angellette Smith, flew into Miami Christmas Eve. The couple had plans to sail around the Caribbean for a while, when they encountered rough seas and crushing waves, and they found themselves washed ashore with substantial damages to the boat. Unfortunately it wasn't in a Bahamian out-island or anything quite so romantic. No, they were in Cuba and Ms. Smith did not have a passport, and neither of them had visas for travel to Cuba. So they got everyone's Holiday wish, to spend a night in a Cuban jail, waiting for U.S. authorities to secure their release! They were released Dec. 26 and finally this past week were able to fly back to Florida. There's no word on whether they encountered any millionaires, movie stars or professors along the way.
A 57-year-old man in Missoula, Montana man says he is lucky to be alive today, after accidentally crashing his bicycle. You'd probably figure he crashed into what - a car? A wall? Maybe a dog? No, middle-school teacher Jim Litz said he often sees wild bears during his daily commute home along a dirt road, but he wasn't paying close enough attention the other day and ran headlong into the side of a large black bear that had wandered into his path. The local newspaper, the Missoula Missoulian (nice name - very original), quoted Mr. Litz as saying “I didn’t have time to respond, or even hit my brakes.” He said the impact flipped him off his bike, at which point the bear began clawing at him, apparently in confusion and anger. The attack left Litz with scratches and bruises over most of his body, but he holds no ill will toward the animal. I'd bet if we interviewed the animal, he'd hold plenty of ill will towards Jim Litz! "Dang that hurt - maybe I oughta kill somebody...."
Everybody sing along: "A THREE HOUR TOUR...." Yes, we have a Gilligan-related travel incident to report. Robert Vassallo and his girlfriend, Angellette Smith, flew into Miami Christmas Eve. The couple had plans to sail around the Caribbean for a while, when they encountered rough seas and crushing waves, and they found themselves washed ashore with substantial damages to the boat. Unfortunately it wasn't in a Bahamian out-island or anything quite so romantic. No, they were in Cuba and Ms. Smith did not have a passport, and neither of them had visas for travel to Cuba. So they got everyone's Holiday wish, to spend a night in a Cuban jail, waiting for U.S. authorities to secure their release! They were released Dec. 26 and finally this past week were able to fly back to Florida. There's no word on whether they encountered any millionaires, movie stars or professors along the way.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Party On, Garth!
If you have a party or adventurous spirit, here's a good way to spend $13 bucks: Michael Guerriero has just released a book, called Party Across America! 101 of the Greatest Festivals, Sporting Events, and Celebrations in the U.S. It's a compilation of famous, and not-so-famous events, parties, festivals and such that will really get your juices flowing. If you're a foodie, you'll want to head to the Windy City at the end of June/early July for "Taste Of Chicago." I can personally vouch for this one, as my First Mate and I experienced this 2 years ago. Amazing array of deep-dish pizzas, gyros, Chicago-style hotdogs, burgers, beer, and way more options than you can list in 1 blog. Make that a lunch stop, then head over to Buddy Guy's Legends at night for some raw Chicago blues, and you've got yourself a world-class day.
The winner of wildest party, believe it or not, is St. Patrick's day in Butte, Montana - particularly the the week or so leading up to the holiday. Why Butte? In the 1870's, it was a huge copper-mining boomtown, and descendants of the Irish miners are still there today. If you're not going to Ireland, this may be the next-best thing. The party is virtually everywhere, spilling into the streets all week. How about best weird celebration? When I think of Buffalo, New York I think of Niagara Falls, or Frank & Teresa's Anchor Bar, original home of Buffalo hot wings (truthfully!). Now there is a new reason to visit, the Saturday following Thanksgiving. It's called "The World's Largest Disco", and they generally sell over 8,000 tickets in less than 72 hours. Gyrate, dance, strut, break out your 35-year old Nik-Nik shirt (if it still fits), and dance and spin your way into a Disco inferno!
Speaking of musical festivals, I was unfamiliar with this one, but there is something called "Coachella" (sounds more like a sports festival), which takes place April 17-19 in Indio, California. According to Michael Guerriero, this festival is full of music, art outlets, laser light shows, the works. I figured it must be something with regional bands, but I went to their website and the lineup is a whopper, including a variety of styles. How about seeing all these artists at one venue?:
Prince
Dwight Yoakam
Death Cab For Cutie
Roger Waters
Jack Johnson
Love And Rockets
Kraftwerk
Fatboy Slim
The Breeders
Oh yeah....add on another 100 bands, and that's "Coachella". The book includes other more well-known events as well, such as Mardi Gras and Tampa's Gasparilla Pirate Festival, but for the ambitious-at-heart, this book has some great ideas to map out your parties for 2009.
The Alabama Department of Industrial Relations administers unemployment benefits, and sets up toll-free numbers for jobless Alabama residents to apply for benefits. Call centers in Montgomery and Birmingham are supposed to get the calls. Well, on Dec. 26th Linda Jahraus started getting calls at 5am. So did Cybil and Harvey Bernash. To the tune of more than 50 calls per day. What makes this so unusual you ask? Ms. Jahraus and the Bernashes live in Irvine, California! Not only that, but Ms. Jahraus and Mr. & Mrs. Bernash know each other, and are friends. After Cybil received a few of the calls, she asked the callers what number they had dialed, so she decided to call that number and complain to the Alabama Unemployment Office, in hopes of fixing the problem. Whe she called the number, Linda Jahrous answered. "I thought she was kidding," said Mrs. Bernash, "then we both realized we were stuck in telephone hell." Both parties attempted to contact Alabama officials, with little or no success. Jahraus then decided to contacted an Alabama newspaper, the Montgomery Advertiser, which reported the story Friday. Alabama Industrial Relations Director Tom Surtees said state officials are working hard to resolve the problem. "I can't explain somebody sitting in north Alabama making a call, and it ending up in somebody's private residence in California," he said. A spokeswoman for AT&T Alabama, which has the department's account, called the problem unusual (my 1st 2009 vote for understatement-of-the-year).
Here's a New Year's story from Rochester, Michigan. CONGRATULATIONS to Tarrance Griffin Senior and his lovely wife, who gave birth to twins 1 year apart! Huh? Yes indeedy, Tarrance Griffin Jr. was born New Year's Eve at 11:51pm, making his birthdate 12/31/08. His younger brother Tariq Griffin was born 26 minutes later at 12:17am New Year's Day, making his birthdate 1/1/09. So officially, 1 boy is a year older than the other on a technicality. Both boys and parent are doing well, except for the confusing explanations they'll have to deal with for the rest of their lives.
In a not-quite-as-heavenly Holiday story, authorities in Northeast Tennessee have arrested a man because of his Christmas decorations. The Johnson City Press reports that Unicoi County Sheriff Kent Harris acted on a search warrant, which was issued after anonymous tips came in about unusual decorations in the man's yard. There were several ceramic angels, a set of praying hands, numerous flower arrangements, several small Christmas trees and ornaments. Although fairly religious, it didn't sound that unusual at first. However, many of the items matched the exact description of a recent theft from nearby Evergreen Cemetery. When confronted with the evidence, including an eyewitness who placed the man at the Cemetery and saw him loading the items into his car, he said "No, that wasn't me. I don't know how these things got in my yard - I'm guessing the wind blew them here." Sounds like the wind isn't the only blowhard in this part of Tennessee...
New Year's Resolution #1: Lose Weight. That one applies to about 90% of Americans, and we're not just talking humans here. See if this story, and the weight-loss process, sounds as familiar as Dr. Phil:
If cable network Animal Planet ran a "Biggest Loser" competition, there are 7 elephants at the San Diego Zoo who might take the cake. Oops...I mean low-calorie bean curd. These pachyderms have lost a combined total of 11,314 pounds since zookeepers enforced a nutrition and exercise regiment for them, which started in 2000. Captive elephants that zoo visitors are familiar with are mostly overweight, compared to those in the wild. To get the elephants back in shape, zookeepers introduced a diet high in hay and stopped feeding them treats such as bread, corn and jelly beans. Instead of three large meals per day, the big-top-big-boys received several small meals. Zookeepers also scatter the food around the yard so the elephants have to work harder to find it. Zookeepers also trained the elephants to walk laps around their enclosure. Workers rake the packed soil to simulate jogging on soft sand, to encourage them even further. Hmmmm. That does it. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to exercise more, cut back on my jelly beans, and eat some hay. Well, maybe Shredded Wheat. There are limits to sanity after all.
The winner of wildest party, believe it or not, is St. Patrick's day in Butte, Montana - particularly the the week or so leading up to the holiday. Why Butte? In the 1870's, it was a huge copper-mining boomtown, and descendants of the Irish miners are still there today. If you're not going to Ireland, this may be the next-best thing. The party is virtually everywhere, spilling into the streets all week. How about best weird celebration? When I think of Buffalo, New York I think of Niagara Falls, or Frank & Teresa's Anchor Bar, original home of Buffalo hot wings (truthfully!). Now there is a new reason to visit, the Saturday following Thanksgiving. It's called "The World's Largest Disco", and they generally sell over 8,000 tickets in less than 72 hours. Gyrate, dance, strut, break out your 35-year old Nik-Nik shirt (if it still fits), and dance and spin your way into a Disco inferno!
Speaking of musical festivals, I was unfamiliar with this one, but there is something called "Coachella" (sounds more like a sports festival), which takes place April 17-19 in Indio, California. According to Michael Guerriero, this festival is full of music, art outlets, laser light shows, the works. I figured it must be something with regional bands, but I went to their website and the lineup is a whopper, including a variety of styles. How about seeing all these artists at one venue?:
Prince
Dwight Yoakam
Death Cab For Cutie
Roger Waters
Jack Johnson
Love And Rockets
Kraftwerk
Fatboy Slim
The Breeders
Oh yeah....add on another 100 bands, and that's "Coachella". The book includes other more well-known events as well, such as Mardi Gras and Tampa's Gasparilla Pirate Festival, but for the ambitious-at-heart, this book has some great ideas to map out your parties for 2009.
The Alabama Department of Industrial Relations administers unemployment benefits, and sets up toll-free numbers for jobless Alabama residents to apply for benefits. Call centers in Montgomery and Birmingham are supposed to get the calls. Well, on Dec. 26th Linda Jahraus started getting calls at 5am. So did Cybil and Harvey Bernash. To the tune of more than 50 calls per day. What makes this so unusual you ask? Ms. Jahraus and the Bernashes live in Irvine, California! Not only that, but Ms. Jahraus and Mr. & Mrs. Bernash know each other, and are friends. After Cybil received a few of the calls, she asked the callers what number they had dialed, so she decided to call that number and complain to the Alabama Unemployment Office, in hopes of fixing the problem. Whe she called the number, Linda Jahrous answered. "I thought she was kidding," said Mrs. Bernash, "then we both realized we were stuck in telephone hell." Both parties attempted to contact Alabama officials, with little or no success. Jahraus then decided to contacted an Alabama newspaper, the Montgomery Advertiser, which reported the story Friday. Alabama Industrial Relations Director Tom Surtees said state officials are working hard to resolve the problem. "I can't explain somebody sitting in north Alabama making a call, and it ending up in somebody's private residence in California," he said. A spokeswoman for AT&T Alabama, which has the department's account, called the problem unusual (my 1st 2009 vote for understatement-of-the-year).
Here's a New Year's story from Rochester, Michigan. CONGRATULATIONS to Tarrance Griffin Senior and his lovely wife, who gave birth to twins 1 year apart! Huh? Yes indeedy, Tarrance Griffin Jr. was born New Year's Eve at 11:51pm, making his birthdate 12/31/08. His younger brother Tariq Griffin was born 26 minutes later at 12:17am New Year's Day, making his birthdate 1/1/09. So officially, 1 boy is a year older than the other on a technicality. Both boys and parent are doing well, except for the confusing explanations they'll have to deal with for the rest of their lives.
In a not-quite-as-heavenly Holiday story, authorities in Northeast Tennessee have arrested a man because of his Christmas decorations. The Johnson City Press reports that Unicoi County Sheriff Kent Harris acted on a search warrant, which was issued after anonymous tips came in about unusual decorations in the man's yard. There were several ceramic angels, a set of praying hands, numerous flower arrangements, several small Christmas trees and ornaments. Although fairly religious, it didn't sound that unusual at first. However, many of the items matched the exact description of a recent theft from nearby Evergreen Cemetery. When confronted with the evidence, including an eyewitness who placed the man at the Cemetery and saw him loading the items into his car, he said "No, that wasn't me. I don't know how these things got in my yard - I'm guessing the wind blew them here." Sounds like the wind isn't the only blowhard in this part of Tennessee...
New Year's Resolution #1: Lose Weight. That one applies to about 90% of Americans, and we're not just talking humans here. See if this story, and the weight-loss process, sounds as familiar as Dr. Phil:
If cable network Animal Planet ran a "Biggest Loser" competition, there are 7 elephants at the San Diego Zoo who might take the cake. Oops...I mean low-calorie bean curd. These pachyderms have lost a combined total of 11,314 pounds since zookeepers enforced a nutrition and exercise regiment for them, which started in 2000. Captive elephants that zoo visitors are familiar with are mostly overweight, compared to those in the wild. To get the elephants back in shape, zookeepers introduced a diet high in hay and stopped feeding them treats such as bread, corn and jelly beans. Instead of three large meals per day, the big-top-big-boys received several small meals. Zookeepers also scatter the food around the yard so the elephants have to work harder to find it. Zookeepers also trained the elephants to walk laps around their enclosure. Workers rake the packed soil to simulate jogging on soft sand, to encourage them even further. Hmmmm. That does it. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to exercise more, cut back on my jelly beans, and eat some hay. Well, maybe Shredded Wheat. There are limits to sanity after all.
Friday, January 2, 2009
Let's not go overboard...
Last week it was a possible jumper going overboard on an NCL cruise, and New Year's Eve (just after midnight) a Carnival cruise line staff member went overboard as well, though this one was clearly an accident with witnesses. Was alcohol involved? All indications say yes, and it's very unfortunate. In the old days of cruising, when there weren't so many balconies and exposed areas, it was extremely rare to hear of anyone going overboard on a ship, but the combination of much easier access to open air, plus the fact that more people cruise now than in years past, makes this unfortunately more common. No one fully understands suicide anyway, but a long fall to the water in the dark, where you may or may not live for a while, sounds particularly morbid to me. We can only hope this phase passes with a much lesser number of incidents in the future.
TAKE OFF, EH? That famous line is repeated by brothers Bob & Doug McKenzie (Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas), from their SCTV skit Great White North. And this new year, it applies to someone else. On New Year's Eve, Northwest flight 59 departed from Amsterdam, heading to Boston Mass with a head-count of 124 people on board. Approximately 8 hours later, the flight landed safely at Boston's Logan International Airport. The headcount? 125. No, that's not a misprint...a Dutch woman went into labor and gave birth to a baby girl, a couple of hours before landing. Even though the mother and child needed to be rushed to Mass General Hospital, they had to be wheeled through US Customs along the way. Passenger 125, as yet unnamed, still had to be accounted for and a nationality declared. After a few minutes of discussion, it was determined by the authorities that the birth had taken place in airspace belonging to Canada, making the child legally Canadian! Yeah. Try to figure the paperwork out on THAT one... Take off, eh?!
Police in Westchester County, New York said a recent driver's test left a lot to be desired. A New Rochelle police spokes-person reports a 23-year-old driver was taking a routine driving test, when she rounded a corner Wednesday morning, lost traction and wound up hitting and pinning a man who was cleaning snow off his car. Lt. George Marshall says the examiner tried to use the test car's secondary set of brakes, but they failed. The 33-year-old victim was taken to a hospital with leg and shoulder pain. Investigators are trying to determine whether the accident was due to equipment failure, driver inexperience, speed, snow, or ineffective reaction by the in-car tester. Lt. Marshall says no citations have been issued, but the student-driver will have to retake the test. That would be AFTER the lawsuit, I'm sure.
You know what they say about champagne tastes and a beer budget? In this economy, even the beer ain't cheap, but a Kenosha Wisconsin man wasn't going to let a little thing like being broke stop him from throwing a big-'ol Holiday bash. The Associated Press reports that 43-year-old Brian A. Rubenstein tried to steal $625 in groceries. It's sad to hear, but I was anticipating the theft was milk, eggs, cereal, veggies, etc. Then I kept reading. It turns out Mr. Rubenstein's basket contained $365 worth of lobster, $213 in ribeye and beef roasts, a smoked ham, an apple pie and a fruit platter. Police in Racine, where the store is located, said the man was arrested Dec. 23 after store employees caught him walking out with a loaded cart. He was charged with misdemeanor retail theft, which carries a maximum penalty of nine months in prison and a $10,000 fine. I'm thinking your prison "eats" are going to be more along the oatmeal and gruel line, so good luck finding a cellmate who keeps lace napkins and caviar handy, Brian...
Hey Brits! Get a puppy for heaven's sake. The British Federation of Herpetologists (no, nothing to do with a disease) recently announced that the number of reptiles kept as pets in the U.K. has clearly surpassed the number of pet dogs nation-wide (8.5 million slimers, to about 6 million woofers). One benchmark the federation used for its calculation is the booming sales in reptile food, such as locusts, frozen rodents and crickets, now about 20 million a week. I don't know which is more disturbing: Mumsy and Daddy buying snakes, skinks and alligators for the kids, or whether it's possible that Brits are finding new edible uses for locusts, rodents and crickets. Remind me to skip the porridge and stew next time I'm over there. Puh-LEASE!
Did somebody just Swoosh by me? A woman named Arien O'Connell posted the fastest time in 2008's Nike Women's Marathon in San Francisco, and logically she expected to be declared the winner. Ehhhhh, not so much. Nike executives had made an extensive bid to bring elite runners to the competition, to bolster its National standing in events of its sort. One of the perks they threw in was a promise that one of this elite group would surely be declared the "winner." Consequently, first place was given to a woman who ran 11 minutes behind O'Connell. After a storm of complaints, Nike reluctantly settled on calling both women "winners" and promised to review the matter before the 2009 race. By those same standards, Nike has decided to look back to 1990 retrospectively, to Super Bowl 24. Apparently more Denver Broncos were wearing Nike undergarments than the San Francisco 49'ers, so Denver was declared the winner despite a stupid scoreboard that showed a final score of 55-10 in favor of the 49'ers. I mean fair-is-fair, right?
Speaking of people who can't run as fast as they thought, William Jarrett, age 38, was charged in Hempstead Village, New York with swiping a necklace from a 32-year-old pregnant woman. He grabbed the necklace from her and ran off at top speed. Despite her condition, the woman chased after him for six blocks, screaming at him to stop. She caught up to him and was attempting to wrestle the necklace away from him, just as a police officer was arriving on the scene. Explain that one to your cellmate, Homes.
TAKE OFF, EH? That famous line is repeated by brothers Bob & Doug McKenzie (Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas), from their SCTV skit Great White North. And this new year, it applies to someone else. On New Year's Eve, Northwest flight 59 departed from Amsterdam, heading to Boston Mass with a head-count of 124 people on board. Approximately 8 hours later, the flight landed safely at Boston's Logan International Airport. The headcount? 125. No, that's not a misprint...a Dutch woman went into labor and gave birth to a baby girl, a couple of hours before landing. Even though the mother and child needed to be rushed to Mass General Hospital, they had to be wheeled through US Customs along the way. Passenger 125, as yet unnamed, still had to be accounted for and a nationality declared. After a few minutes of discussion, it was determined by the authorities that the birth had taken place in airspace belonging to Canada, making the child legally Canadian! Yeah. Try to figure the paperwork out on THAT one... Take off, eh?!
Police in Westchester County, New York said a recent driver's test left a lot to be desired. A New Rochelle police spokes-person reports a 23-year-old driver was taking a routine driving test, when she rounded a corner Wednesday morning, lost traction and wound up hitting and pinning a man who was cleaning snow off his car. Lt. George Marshall says the examiner tried to use the test car's secondary set of brakes, but they failed. The 33-year-old victim was taken to a hospital with leg and shoulder pain. Investigators are trying to determine whether the accident was due to equipment failure, driver inexperience, speed, snow, or ineffective reaction by the in-car tester. Lt. Marshall says no citations have been issued, but the student-driver will have to retake the test. That would be AFTER the lawsuit, I'm sure.
You know what they say about champagne tastes and a beer budget? In this economy, even the beer ain't cheap, but a Kenosha Wisconsin man wasn't going to let a little thing like being broke stop him from throwing a big-'ol Holiday bash. The Associated Press reports that 43-year-old Brian A. Rubenstein tried to steal $625 in groceries. It's sad to hear, but I was anticipating the theft was milk, eggs, cereal, veggies, etc. Then I kept reading. It turns out Mr. Rubenstein's basket contained $365 worth of lobster, $213 in ribeye and beef roasts, a smoked ham, an apple pie and a fruit platter. Police in Racine, where the store is located, said the man was arrested Dec. 23 after store employees caught him walking out with a loaded cart. He was charged with misdemeanor retail theft, which carries a maximum penalty of nine months in prison and a $10,000 fine. I'm thinking your prison "eats" are going to be more along the oatmeal and gruel line, so good luck finding a cellmate who keeps lace napkins and caviar handy, Brian...
Hey Brits! Get a puppy for heaven's sake. The British Federation of Herpetologists (no, nothing to do with a disease) recently announced that the number of reptiles kept as pets in the U.K. has clearly surpassed the number of pet dogs nation-wide (8.5 million slimers, to about 6 million woofers). One benchmark the federation used for its calculation is the booming sales in reptile food, such as locusts, frozen rodents and crickets, now about 20 million a week. I don't know which is more disturbing: Mumsy and Daddy buying snakes, skinks and alligators for the kids, or whether it's possible that Brits are finding new edible uses for locusts, rodents and crickets. Remind me to skip the porridge and stew next time I'm over there. Puh-LEASE!
Did somebody just Swoosh by me? A woman named Arien O'Connell posted the fastest time in 2008's Nike Women's Marathon in San Francisco, and logically she expected to be declared the winner. Ehhhhh, not so much. Nike executives had made an extensive bid to bring elite runners to the competition, to bolster its National standing in events of its sort. One of the perks they threw in was a promise that one of this elite group would surely be declared the "winner." Consequently, first place was given to a woman who ran 11 minutes behind O'Connell. After a storm of complaints, Nike reluctantly settled on calling both women "winners" and promised to review the matter before the 2009 race. By those same standards, Nike has decided to look back to 1990 retrospectively, to Super Bowl 24. Apparently more Denver Broncos were wearing Nike undergarments than the San Francisco 49'ers, so Denver was declared the winner despite a stupid scoreboard that showed a final score of 55-10 in favor of the 49'ers. I mean fair-is-fair, right?
Speaking of people who can't run as fast as they thought, William Jarrett, age 38, was charged in Hempstead Village, New York with swiping a necklace from a 32-year-old pregnant woman. He grabbed the necklace from her and ran off at top speed. Despite her condition, the woman chased after him for six blocks, screaming at him to stop. She caught up to him and was attempting to wrestle the necklace away from him, just as a police officer was arriving on the scene. Explain that one to your cellmate, Homes.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
2008, Get thee behind me!
Short and sweet today, my travelators. I'm getting ready to head up to the bridge, to RUM in the New Year! We haven't even started 2009 yet, but I am going out on a limb with a bold prediction. It's gonna be better than this piece-of-junk 2008. About the only good thing that happened in '08 was the feeling America has with a new administration, that maybe - just maybe we can get our act together again as one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. Amen to that. Stay safe tonight, and pass the Cheez Doodles.
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