2008 New Ship of the Year

Over the last week or so, I've noted a few comments about Celebrity's new "Solstice", and the votes of industry critics are now in. Even though the new Carnival Splendour and Ruby Princess had their moments in the sun, Celebrity Solstice is the hands-down and near-unanimous victor of this year's best newbie award. At a cost of $750 million dollars, the Solstice will price higher than the competition as well, so it'll be interesting to see in the current economy how that translates. But all indications are that people will pay more for better. Historically, they always have. There are reasons why finer hotels such as the Ritz-Carltons of the world remain full and in high-demand. Congratulations to Celebrity on a lot of ground-breaking ideas, and for anyone who is able to travel on short notice, there are still some bargain rates on Solstice for last-minute travel. Once word gets out completely, and in light of this award, many of the "deal" prices will disappear.

Didja ever hear about a good relationship gone bad? How about a bad relationship gone worse?! That's apparently the case with the TSA's airport screeners and the traveling public. In a report on USAToday, the dysfunction came pouring out when groups of passengers and screeners met for the first time with a TSA consultant. Passengers complained that screeners are "poorly skilled, poorly paid and mistake-prone." Screeners bristled at "daily instances of lack of respect and abuse." A 73-page report by the Manhattan company provides rare insight into the perception of a high-profile Federal agency, and illustrates how public opinion shapes policy. For example, after hearing business travelers and families say they didn't like sharing security checkpoints, the TSA began guiding them into separate lanes at nearly 50 airports. Last week, TSA rolled out a series of videos accessible through travel websites that explain why passengers have to take off their shoes, take out their liquids and show IDs at checkpoints. YES, apparently we need videos to explain all this to us (good heavens). Watching the news every night of our lives isn't nearly enough!

The research approach is the brainchild of Ellen Howe, the TSA's chief spokeswoman and head of Communications and Public Affairs. The company she hired held five 3½-hour sessions with 16 to 18 passengers in New York City, Minneapolis and Washington, D.C. Two three-hour sessions were held with 12 to 15 screeners at Chicago O'Hare and New York's John F. Kennedy airports. Passengers were told only that they would be asked about travel. "Some of it was hard to hear," Howe said, "and they weren't holding back, either." The report points out that passengers want to respect screeners, so they can have confidence and feel they really are safe. The consulting firm had suggestions for screeners, such as no slouching, pristine uniforms, making eye contact and (get this) smile a little. They also suggested checkpoint signs should be "less dense", although I often think it's the passengers who are a few carrots short of a bunch, which you just can't really blame on the signs, now can you? A.J. Castilla, a screener and union leader at Boston's Logan International Airport, said the TSA needs to do a better job marketing the seriousness and deadliness of the job. He sees passengers assault screeners and heave shoes across a checkpoint. European passengers are far more respectful, Castilla said, because their countries have seen more terrorist acts, such as the attempted car bombing of the airport in Glasgow, Scotland.

So here's the deal, friends and neighbors. Whenever you come on board my vessel, I'm gonna be standing there by the gangway, and I'm all smiles and says "Welcome, Land-lubber." That's about the time I expect you to smile back and say "Thanks, Cap'n!" 'Cause if'n you don't, or you make some kind of snide remark about how my ship needs a fresh coat of paint or why does that Cap'n guy have grease on his shoes, you'd better be prepared for an impromptu bath, overboard as quick as she goes. Respect me, and I'll respect you, and vicey versey. If it works on my tug, it ought to work at the airport just about the same way. C'mon people now, smile on your brother everybody get together, try to love one another right now...

In 2003, retired Colorado businessman John Haines, visited the Tomb of the Unknowns at Arlington National Cemetery, and was disturbed by the number of cracks and the condition of the monument overall. He decided to take matters into his own hands, and wanted to set things right for this historic and reverent gravesite. Mr. Haines went on a 1-man crusade, and after going to great lengths of personal research and expense, he was able to find and purchase a huge slab of the identical high-grade white marble of which the Tomb is constructed. As a service to the United States as a concerned citizen, he offered his astounding find free of charge and including shipping, to the U.S. Army, whom he had read had been considering reconstruction of the Tomb, since 1987. It was the answer to everything the Army needed, absolutely without cost to the American taxpayer. Oops. That's a problem. Apparently Mr. Haines thought of the idea, not Army brass. So now, in the ensuing five years according to a story in the Denver Post, the Army continues to ignore Mr. Haines' generosity. They simply won't take his gift, or even contact him about it. Periodically, however, they discuss opening up the proposed reconstruction project to competitive bidding! This kind of thing gripes me no end, and we can only hope for better under the next Administration. I only wish the newspaper would have named names on who is turning down a free donation. It would be nice to see who among the Army's top dogs needs to be demoted, or have their backsides booted for ignorance.

Here's your daily dose of KARMA! The Dayton (Ohio) Daily News tells a story about local police, who were trying to arrest a 31-yr old man on dog-fighting charges. Dayton Police Lt. Patrick Welsh said his department received a tip, and when the suspect was confronted, he turned-tail and ran off into the night. Luckily, the anonymous tip had been answered by a K-9 Unit, and the suspect was brought to the ground by a furry, 4-legged officer. He was treated for dog bites to his wrist and ankles, and taken directly to jail. RUFF justice, Mates!