Terminal Illness

A while back, Tom Hanks appeared in a movie called "The Terminal". It certainly wasn't anything Oscar-worthy, but it killed a couple of hours in a theater. There's an old saying that art imitates life, but now life imitates art. Hiroshi Nohara is a Japanese citizen who had a layover connection in Mexico City back in early September. It has now lasted almost three months, and he has no plans to leave. For reasons no one seems to be able to explain, the Japanese man has been in Terminal 1 of Benito Juarez International Airport since Sept. 2, surviving off donations from fast-food restaurants and passengers, while sleeping in a chair. At first, he frightened fellow air-travelers, and airport authorities asked the Japanese Embassy to investigate why the foul-smelling man refused to leave. Now, he's become somewhat of a celebrity, capturing Mexico's collective imagination with near- daily TV reports on his life at the food court. Tourists stop to pose with him for photos or get an autograph. A native of Tokyo, he flew into Mexico with a tourist visa and a return ticket home, but inexplicably never left the airport. In a recent interview, he said he had no motive and doesn't know how much longer he'll remain.

"I don't understand why I'm here," he said through an interpreter. "I don't have a reason." The embassy can't force him to leave if he's mentally competent (apparently he is), and since Nohara's visa is valid, all Mexican officials can do it wait for it to expire in early March. During his stay, Nohara's wiry goatee has grown into a scraggly mess. His red-tinted hair is speckled with dust and dandruff, and his jacket and fleece blanket are dingy with overuse. He hasn't had a shower in months. Various stalls in the food court give Nohara free snacks and drinks, and strangers often buy him pastries or hamburgers; of the two, he clearly prefers hamburgers.

Is it just me, or wouldn't this whole scene put a damper on the ambiance of the food court? Then again, how much ambiance is there in a food court in Mexico City to begin with? Hopefully in March Mr. N will make his way back home. It would be nice to know exactly which day he's going to fly, as I'm sure nobody is going to want to be on that same plane. Pheeew!!

Phoenix-based Residential Cruise Line is the latest to try the super-luxury cruises, aimed at a condominium/time-share concept. There will be an invitation-only sales event in Dubai on Dec. 15th, and if you're one of the lucky bidders you can get the top-of-the-line suite. Pricetag? A mere $18 million dollars. In this economy. I might send out those top executives for drug testing at this point, but then again maybe rich folk have more money than sense. Anyway, the ship's $18 million Portofino penthouse (there are TWO of them, too!), comes with 4 bedrooms, 5 bathrooms and measures more than 4,300 square feet. Yeah, I know whenever I cruise I like to bring the aunts, uncles, a few dozen Gypsies and a small Midwest town.

The other day, I blogged about a not-too-smart rap "artist", who got himself convicted by rapping the true details about his crimes. Well, if that was "A" this is "B"....

When 24-year-old Andrew Vactor of Urbana, Ohio, was convicted of violating the city's noise ordinance, Judge Susan J. Fornof-Lippencott offered to reduce the normal fine of $150 to just $35, if he agreed to listen to 20 hours of classical music. Wanting to save money, Mr. Vactor agreed to the unusual punishment. The sentence was to include Beethoven, Chopin, Bach, and Debussy. Chief Probation Officer Glenda Runkle says the department keeps three CDs on hand, and he was getting a "greatest hits" assortment of the classics. Judge Fornof-Lippencott often assigns creative sentencing options." She selects episodes of Dr. Phil & The Oprah Winfrey Show that she considers relevant to other misdemeanor offenses, supplying copies to the probation department for forced viewing. The idea is to inspire people not to come back for the same violation, and at the same time broaden their horizons. Vactor, a student at Urbana University, listened to a full 15 minutes of the classics before calling the judge, to say he'd changed his mind. He agreed to just pay the full $150 fine! He claims it had nothing to do with the musical style, only that he was late for basketball practice. So much for "YO"hann Sebastion Bach.