Don't Be A Bunch Of Twits

Twitters, Tweeters, Twizzlers, Tweezers, whatever you or your kids happen to be, I'm here to bring you back to reality. If only a little bit. The current generation lives in the moment, and anything older than 3 minutes ago is pretty much passe (that's French for "who gives a dang?"). That's why you hear people call their friends, asking "What're you up to?" and 5 minutes later, another call, "How about now?" Sad, ain't it? Self-reliance, self-confidence, keeping focus on the task at hand, also appear to be passe. Nobody can live without keeping up with as many Joneses as they know. Now look at me, as a shining example of how to live your life without pesky interruptions.

1) No cell phone. Not now, not ever
2) No hand-held devices, other than a pen, fork, spoon, or beer
3) No laptop, not even much of a lap

There you have it, simplicity personified! When I arrive on the bridge for work, steering my ship to her next port of call, that one task takes all my energy and focus. It keeps me safe, keeps my passengers and crew safe, and if anyone comes up and asks "What're you up to?" I'd just sneer at 'em and say "Tryin' not to let some Twit wreck us!" By the way, you've gotta love the name Twitter. Derived from Twit. The second two-thirds of the word Nitwit. The Dictionary describes a Twit as a "foolishly annoying person." Need I say more?

So why am I all over Twits and Facebookers and Textomaniacs and MySpaceCadets? Because when they're so busy socializing and networking, the first casualty is often COMMON SENSE. You know about the people driving and talking, driving and texting, driving and tweeting - actually, what they're NOT doing is driving! But I'm not writing today about that, I'm writing about something I deal with all the time, which is selling travel. My generation and my parents' and so on would plan well when going on vacation. We'd contact the Post Office and stop mail service. We'd tell a trusted friend or neighbor to keep an eye out, and we'd never dream of putting a message on our answering machines, saying we were out of town or gone for a week. That's common sense, keeping a low profile as a protection for your home and property. Enter Generation Y (also known as Generation WHY?!). It's not just the kids, either. It can be anyone in the family who writes on their homepage "See you in 2 weeks - we're off to Disney World!" or "Later everybody - I'll be in touch from the Internet Cafe on our cruise!" Or you just posted real-time vacation photos saying "This is ME on top of Mt. Pookapootie." Guess what - you've just informed the known Universe that, just like many MySpaceCadets, the lights are on but nobody's home. You've told them the timetable. Your personal information, including your home address, is pretty much available to anyone on Earth who is good with a computer, and that's exactly who you're talking to. That's why I'm mentioning it on this-here blog, since we're now into Summer Vacation season, and I wanted to remind you to check yourself AND your young-un's ME ME ME websites, to make sure you don't come home to a big surprise.

It's been a good day. I called 2 of my clients earlier, to tell them I was able to upgrade them on their Alaska cruise, AND save them nearly $500. That's not an every-day thing, but it happens on occasion. People who go onto website A or B to book their travel, usually do so with a faceless, nameless reservation number and that's it. I saw it, I liked the price, I bought it and I'm done, all in the comfort of my living room and my favorite shorts. Well, lucky you. The problem is, what if something goes wrong on your trip? Who do you call, and what do they know about the history of your booking? Now you're on vacation, but it doesn't FEEL like vacation, and you have no one in your corner as an advocate. Or like the case with me today. Once my clients put down a deposit on a trip, I watch that reservation faithfully, and if there is ever a super-sale, special promotion, or fare adjustment I make sure my client gets that savings. If you book on website A or B, the computer got your money, and is programmed only to move on to the next customer and his or her credit card. You're already done - literally! And for you book-it-in-my-shorts types, all you have to do is email me and 99 times or more out of a hundred I can get you the same deal, or a better deal, and you get my services for free. Even if you're booking direct with a trusted cruise line or tour operator, you should Ask The Cap'n before giving anyone your credit card! You're booking with the power of one person. When I book you, it's part of the American Express network, and we often have group space held, where you can get a lower price using the buying power of a hundred people, not just one. Buying travel is not the same as buying an I-phone or a pair of sunglasses. If your vacation is a mess, that's your whole year gone...it can't be fixed until NEXT vacation, so you want to have a strong person standing with you. That would be me, and I love the challenge of finding price reductions for my clients, who become like family. As I said, it's been a good day.

If you didn't already believe health care has run amok, check out a story from the Wisconsin State Journal. The General Manager of the Dean Health Clinic in Madison, Wisconsin received a directive from his Corporate Headquarters: "Here is a list of 50 employees at your facility, whom we want you to lay off immediately." The 30-year veteran executive understands that now means NOW, so he complied. All 50 employees were immediately let go. It went as well as it could for 49 of them. However, the 50th name on the list was an RN who was assisting in surgery at the time. She was pulled from the procedure, leaving the Surgeon with only a hospital staffer to assist in finishing up. A clinic spokesperson later apologized, saying the Manager's timing was inappropriate, and that no patient was ever put at risk.

Why am I suddenly picturing The 3 Stooges: Larry, Curly and Moe, operating on a patient?
"Forceps!" ("Forceps!").
"Clamp!" ("Clamp!").
"Anikanipanistana!" ("Anikanipanistana!")